#Login Register

  • 73 Vote(s) - 3.34 Average

BIGFOOT ! nice perfume , and the Fractal
08-03-2013, 08:46 PM #646
Cynicalabsurdance Member
Posts:9,871 Threads:223 Joined:Feb 2011

Bob " No Tail " had just finish his fish sandwich ,,,
when the quake hit ,,,,

Once down
Bob found gravity and fat , to be enemies .
08-03-2013, 10:21 PM #647
Cynicalabsurdance Member
Posts:9,871 Threads:223 Joined:Feb 2011

My latest investment venture

this is a photo from the Docks

as these are arriving from China

" Big Bag-O-farts "

A Novelty Item as a Gag Gift

I figure my first 1 million dollars profit to be about 6 months

these are to be sold exclusively at Walmart in the Southern
08-04-2013, 05:53 AM #648
Cynicalabsurdance Member
Posts:9,871 Threads:223 Joined:Feb 2011
08-04-2013, 09:19 AM #649
Cynicalabsurdance Member
Posts:9,871 Threads:223 Joined:Feb 2011

As a Telepathic Clairvoyant

I found this Film to be an excellent Film Noir representation of the Gift .

Edward G. Robinson , Gail Russel Star
08-05-2013, 05:34 AM #650
Cynicalabsurdance Member
Posts:9,871 Threads:223 Joined:Feb 2011
In that area where a stream had turned to Ice

and the Ice expansion had cracked the rock

The Trickle began ,,, gradually turned to a River ,,
and over the Millenniums ,

through persistence , the water grooved out a road for itself ,

And the Mighty had Become

She flowed ever on unto the Sea
Lived for thousands of years without a name ,,,

and was Pure , life giving

nurturing ,,,

She was birthed by that which she would birth herself

A Cyclic ,, a Spiral ,, a Snake with it's tail in it's mouth rolling
down her Road ,,,
to live on , and to give to others so they may live on ,,,

She is Mother , and Daughter all in the same moment .

She is Rain before and after

She is Snow all in the like manner

She is the Ice she came from and will return to

Mother and daughter all in the same

Mother birthing Daughter ,,, then Daughter Birthing Mother
to birth again Daughter

The Cyclic of giving on and on into the Mist of her Children

which are
all the Living beings of her World

She is Fractal

08-05-2013, 07:16 AM #651
Cynicalabsurdance Member
Posts:9,871 Threads:223 Joined:Feb 2011
Setting aside your fear of falling

Climbing that mountain in life has less worry .

What was it with Goals being set ?

Success ?

Who thought those up ?

Achievement ?

In what ?

Life ?

is Life Money and your goal should be to obtain as much as you can
in order to exceed and be successful in life ?

What you own and what you wear is what you are ?

Ah ,,, Success is that Pedicure with the little flowers painted on your
Toenails eh ?

Then one day you find counting your Chickens before they hatch
has a price to pay emotionally as well as psychologically ?????

Depression and you seek that little Pill that you learn to love
so much ,,,,,, Right ?

Daddy drove you as a Child to prepare you to become a WINNER,,
Right ?

Well I woke this morning ,,, and my hemorrhoids woke with
a headache Daddy ,,, can I have a pill for my ass ?

Dreaming of that 80 inch Flat screen TV ?

Your headphones should be Skull Candy and nothing less ?

Ipad or Iphone so many choices , which is currently the Fad ?

and should it be Pink ,,,,, or Black , cause silver is so last year .

Did you buy the grape Flavored Condoms as a Treat for the lover ?

Tell me your desires Sweety ,,,, tell me your dreams ,,,

give me your inner child to hang with , and let me feed it
the Gerbers of current Fashion ,,, cause you just know ,,,,

That Inner Child deserves to be spoiled ,,, am I right ?

It's all about YOU ,,, and you will not settle for less .

You are a Prince/Princess of the Ruling Boutique at your
local Mall ,,,
and by God ,,, such Royalty as yourself ,,,

Shall Have the Respect of the Minions below you ,,,, Right ?

You wink ,,,, and your minions fall as Dominos in an Earthquake ,,,
Right ?

You're too sexy for your Catwalk , and someone should
point that out to you every five seconds of your day ,,,,
Right ?

You are a Movie Star ,,, that is just about to be signed to a Contract ,,,
Right ?

Without you ,,,, this World would have no reason to exist ,,,,,,,,
right ?

it's all about you ,,,,,,,,,,,

Right ?

08-05-2013, 11:00 PM #652
Cynicalabsurdance Member
Posts:9,871 Threads:223 Joined:Feb 2011
Then in your complete centrally self focused consciousness ,
at the end of life ,,

you fear your demise far greater than the selfless .

Your self Id is about to have it's time card punched for the final
time ,,,
and it is horrifying to you to think , all that you've been , has
turned out to be nothing more then a PRODUCT of the popular
current fashions of each season you have lived through .

Confronted with the self reflections

You come to understand that you have lived a totally shallow life
existence ,,, contained within , there is nothing of you
spiritually ,,,

it will pass out of that body , devoid of any depth whatsoever .

I once wrote::::
" For you to know what i know , you would have had to
have done what I have done "

I couldn't take you with me , for that path was mine alone .

You had your own path , you refused to adhere to your
inner child's screams to listen to it .

Were you BOUND ,,, or Boundless ?

answer is you were boundless , but ignored that , and set about
yourself a boundary to live within .

A boundary created by you yourself , that the foundation of ,
was reliant on acceptance of yourself by others through
their perceptions of you based on popular material possessions
that you had obtained .
08-06-2013, 02:49 AM #653
Cynicalabsurdance Member
Posts:9,871 Threads:223 Joined:Feb 2011

To follow

The Lyrics
08-06-2013, 02:56 AM #654
Cynicalabsurdance Member
Posts:9,871 Threads:223 Joined:Feb 2011
Written By John Sebastion
performed by the Band " Lovin' Spoonful


the song ::::::::::

~~~~~~~ Darling be home soon ~~~~~

And talk of all the things we did today
And laugh about our funny little ways
While we have a few minutes to breathe
Then I know that it's time you must leave

But darling be home soon
I couldn't bear to wait an extra minute if you dawdled
My darling be home soon
It's not just these few hours but I've been waiting since I toddled
For the great relief of having you to talk to

And now
A quarter of my life is almost past
I think I've come to see myself at last
And I see that the time spent confused
Was the time that I spent without you
And I feel myself in bloom

So darling be home soon
I couldn't bear to wait an extra minute if you dawdled
My darling be home soon
It's not just these few hours but I've been waiting since I toddled
For the great relief of having you to talk to

------ instrumental break ------

Darling be home soon
I couldn't bear to wait an extra minute if you dawdled
My darling be home soon
It's not just these few hours but I've been waiting since I toddled
For the great relief of having you to talk to

And beat your crazy head against the sky
And see beyond the houses and your eyes
It's ok to shoot the moon

So darling
My darling be home soon
I couldn't bear to wait an extra minute if you dawdled
My darling be home soon
It's not just these few hours but I've been waiting since I toddled
For the great relief of having you to talk to
08-06-2013, 10:19 PM #655
Cynicalabsurdance Member
Posts:9,871 Threads:223 Joined:Feb 2011
In some similarity

it's as quicksand for the Soul

Slowly sucking your well being down

down deeper and until
the darkness engulfs complete , full and all encompassing .

soft loving musical whispers

Like a switch flipped

the light slowly seeps back into you

lifting as the shine begins to grow ever wider within .

Can you do this for another Soul ?

Selflessly ?

08-07-2013, 05:31 AM #656
Cynicalabsurdance Member
Posts:9,871 Threads:223 Joined:Feb 2011
If the year 1976 had only One reason to exist ,,,

Then , this is the reason that is the One

Weekend trips down to Ensanada Baja Mexico took place
twice a Month for us ,,,

a Group of people in their early 20's , anywhere from 10 to 25 of us would haul ass down for a weekend of Surf and Puke up the Tequila

One trip we bought a crap load of Fireworks,,,
and smuggled them back to the States for the 4th of July
the following weekend .

heh heh ,,, SNEAKS ! that's what ,, sneaky SNEAKS !

We're at the Border crossing with 11 people in a 1955 Chevy truck ,
with a Home built camper on it .

11 long hairs , women and men , Border guards just know,,,
we've got something to hide ,,, But as one of them said :
" I ain't crawlin' in there to find it ,,

The Camper looked more like a Chicken Coup than a camper ,,

( Want to keep a Cop from searching your vehicle , make a mess in it ,
so it looks like a bio-hazard , he'll pass almost every time )

Just North of San Diego , a couple of the Girls began to cuss ,,,

they needed to hit a bathroom, and Walt the driver
found a closed down Gas Station
with an unlocked bathroom for them .

Carl and myself hit the Men's room while the girls hit the women's

Walt waited at the door of the Women's until the girls were done ,,,

then he went into the Men's room to stack a chocolate bunny in the toilet .

Carl looks at the door of the Mens room with ,,,
a devils grin across his buck teeth ,,

He turns that grin toward me

Rog', got a match ?


He opens his paw and there a bright red Cherry Bomb,,,,,
rotating circles of menace,,,,in his palm ,,

" Com'on , brother Walt need's a wake up for the drive home "

I think " How sweet indeed ,,,, heh heh , lead the way brother "

Carl holds out the fuse on the bomb ,,,

I light the match ,,,
he watches the fuse take light

With his left hand he turns the knob on the bathroom door ,,, opens it ,,,

Patweeeeeee ,,,,,,,,, flings the Bomb inside and under the stall it goes ,,

The bomb lands at Walt's feet

Last I saw before the Door closed ,,,,,

was Walt's feet rise off the tiles
with his pants wrapped around his Ankles ,,,

Blue and White Striped Boxer Shorts scream out loud : " Dear GOD ! "


Funniest thing was ,,,, the Bathroom light hesitated one second after the BLAST ,,,

then Blew up ,,, like it was shocked so bad , it took it a moment to realize
it was supposed to blow out.

Me and Carl RUN for the truck ,,, I grab the door and jump in the front seat,,,,
with ,,,Carl's hips busting into mine right behind me .

We're innocent , we never been out of this truck since we crossed the Border ,,,

Bullshit,,, prove we did it ,,, we don't even know what happened man ,,,,

a Few seconds pass ,,, we wait and watch the bathroom door ,,,

through the transom smoke like an old tire was set a fire ,,, bellows out
and makes the sign of Satan at us as it rises ,,,,

growing horns as it goes ,,,

BOOM ! the door flies open with a Angry kick of the Walt Foot

A Cloud of smoke from ceiling to the tiled floor ,,,,,

barely through the smoke ,,,,
a silhouette of a Man ,,
slow ,,, very slowly ,,,
walking toward us through the smoke

as he exits the cloud ,,,, smoke streams from his hair and Beard,,,
it wraps around behind his Neck,,,,

Oh yeah ,,,, pissed ? PISSED is He,,,,? ,,,, oh indeedy.

Walt slow as cold Molasses dripping off of Ice ,,,
strolls to the front of the truck ,,

Mad Dog gaze through the Windshield ,,,,
first to Carl ,,, then his eyes glide ,,,, MY way ,,,,

I slide down in the seat below the dash with a Right Thumb flicking,,,, ,,,toward Carl

" Him ,,, he did it ,,, that guy ,,, him right there ,,, I saw it ,,,

No good
Walt had seen both our feet from under the stall ,,,


shït !

Life is hate ,,, Life has no reason to be ,,, I'm dead ,,, I'm not here ,,

I left my mind and Body as soon as the fuse was lit ,,,,

My Mother never had a Son , I'm an Abortion that didn't take ,,,


OH GOD,,,, NO !

08-07-2013, 06:31 AM #657
Cynicalabsurdance Member
Posts:9,871 Threads:223 Joined:Feb 2011
~~~~ Song ,,,

~~~~ You'll see ,,, it's a means to an End ~~~~~~~

Wrapped,,,, that's what you feel

Though the feelings ,,,
far too unreal ,,,

Say it seems what it is
is not what it seems to you
seems that way to me
at least that's how I feel

Follow you down
any road you choose

til you come back around
or your trail I lose

It's as I said

You see
wasted time inside your head
and I'm wasted the same way

Long as I can see you
I'm gonna be Ok ,,,

You see ,,, it just turns out that way

don't stand mute with me

it's all the same you see

cause ,,,,
you see ,,, it's a means to an end

another way to get there
and back again

just another

another means to an end

Cry your pain
dry eye's leave you too
much to explain

just go on child
and cry your pain
I'll hold your tears
in the palm of my hand
for what it's worth woman
I'm trying hard to be
your Man

You see, it's a means to an end

an end my friend
08-07-2013, 08:11 AM #658
JayRodney ⓐⓛⓘⓔⓝ
Posts:31,876 Threads:1,454 Joined:Feb 2011
(08-07-2013, 05:31 AM)Cynicalabsurdance Wrote:  ( Want to keep a Cop from searching your vehicle , make a mess in it ,
so it looks like a bio-hazard , he'll pass almost every time )

chuckle.gif CmndrDraco and I were pulled over in Helsinki a few years ago. He's been in some hot water in the past so the cops ALWAYS search his vehicle.
This was the best, he borrowed the van from a friend that had just come back from Estonia packed with Christmas ornaments in back.
You should have seen the look on the cops faces when they opened up the back of the van lmao.gif
They told us to be on our way lol

08-07-2013, 11:20 AM #659
Cynicalabsurdance Member
Posts:9,871 Threads:223 Joined:Feb 2011
heh heh

I was pulled over in a Borrowed Car too

a 1963 VW Bug

because the tail lights were not working ( The owner gave me no
warning that they were out )

Passenger seat was a wasted idiot with eyes glowing red

under the front hood was 4 Lbs of weed ( 4 out of 20 I had just
had flown in From St. Pete FLA )

Cop knew there had to be something up because the drunk acted

I took the cop aside

" Look , that guy Rick is an alcoholic , he showed up at my house
and began causing trouble for my guest .

I was the only sober person there , and had to get him out of the house
before some one beat him to a pulp

My car is broke down so I had to borrow this one from a guest

I've been throug so much crap tonight because of this clown
in the car , now I'm getting a Ticket too
so he is costing me enough trouble ,,

can you just write the ticket and let me get this asshole out of my life
we are two blocks from where I drop him off ,

I'd make him walk from here
but he'd either start a fight with someone , or get ran over

this is a charity case I am doing here

and I have to get home and sleep , I work tomorrow
I get up at 5:00 am
I hang drywall, hard work ,, I'm going to be hating life in the

Cop handed me my License ,,, saying " I used to hang drywall
too , here , I know what your facing in the morning ,,,
Take him home and make sure he goes inside will ya's


We got the 4 pounds delivered

" Hey Rick , here's where you stay ( he was pissing in a Bush )

I slipped it in first gear and tore out of there

Another Cop got Drunk Rick about a block away

Public Drunkenness yay.gifyay.gifyay.gifyay.gifyay.gifyay.gif

That stupid asshole damned near got us searched by the first Cop

I would have got a Felony Charge .

heh heh

He caused so much shït with his drinking .

every day he was wasted

every day he caused trouble

he got his in jail

some one socked him out to shut him up .


08-07-2013, 11:25 AM #660
JayRodney ⓐⓛⓘⓔⓝ
Posts:31,876 Threads:1,454 Joined:Feb 2011
chuckle.gif Nothing says STFU like a black eye.




DISCLAIMER / Terms of Service (TOS):
Kritterbox.com - Socialize anonymously, commentary, discussion, oddities, technology, music and more!  This website is provided "as is" without warranty of any kind, either expressed or implied. kritterbox.com shall not be liable for any damages whatsoever, including, without limitation, those resulting from loss of use, data or profits, whether or not advised of the possibility of damage, and on any theory of liability, arising out of or in connection with the use or performance of this site or other documents which are referenced by or linked to this site.
This website exists solely for the purposes of exchange of information, communication and general entertainment. Opinions from posters are in no way endorsed by kritterbox.com. All posts on this website are the opinion of the authors and are not to be taken as statements of fact on behalf of kritterbox.com. This site may contain coarse language or other material that kritterbox.com is in no way responsible for. Material deemed to be offensive or pornographic at the discretion of kritterbox.com shall be removed. kritterbox.com reserves the right to modify, or remove posts and user accounts on this website at our discretion. kritterbox.com disclaims all liability for damages incurred directly or indirectly as a result of any material on this website. Fictitious posts and any similarity to any person living or dead is coincidental.
All users shall limit the insertion of any and all copyrighted material to portions of the article that are relevant to the point being made, with no more than 50%, and preferably less of the original source material. A link shall be visible in text format, embedded directly to the original source material without exception.
No third party links, i.e. blogs or forums will be accepted under any circumstances, and will be edited by staff in order to reflect the original source of copyrighted material, or be removed at the sole discretion of kritterbox.com.
Fair Use Notice:
This site may contain copyrighted material the use of which has not always been specifically authorized by the copyright owner. Users may make such material available in an effort to advance awareness and understanding of issues relating to economics, individual rights, international affairs, liberty, science, and technology. This constitutes a 'fair use' of any such copyrighted material as provided for in section 107 of the US Copyright Law. In accordance with Title 17 U.S.C.Section 107, the material on this site is distributed without profit to those who have expressed a prior interest in receiving the included information for educational and/or research purposes.
This Disclaimer is subject to change at any time at our discretion.
Copyright © 2011 - 2017 kritterbox.com