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BIGFOOT ! nice perfume , and the Fractal
11-30-2014, 02:22 AM #841
Cynicalabsurdance Member
Posts:9,900 Threads:223 Joined:Feb 2011
Some damned 1940's road side Diner ,
burnt Toast under grits , and Coffee taste as though it was strained through
my socks .

Western style prints all over the walls , and those suck a$$ Wagon Wheel
hanging light fixtures ,

yeah , typical ,
Another day on another two lane road .

Waitress names Sasha ( probably more like Ann , but , dreams of being
an exotic woman )

I tipped by nature , over kill , some waitresses think of it as
my way of saying : " Hey cutie , date ? "

Ma' was a waitress as I grew up , no tips , no eat that night ,
so , it's a guilt thing if I skimp on a tip ,,,
like I know the waitress is struggling and I am cheating her
out of reaching the Stars .

Depressing actually , to see a single Mom worked slinging slop
to Pig People ,, damn , make me an abortion before you make me a single
Mom and a waitress in my next life .

Dirt poor mothers , and this is civilization ?

Get the hell out of here man , this is far from civil .

I stepped off the stool , spun a ten across the counter and up under the
edge of my mostly full breakfast plate ,,,

Three dollar meal and a ten dollar tip ,, yeah , makes perfect sense to
this Hippie .

Stepping outside the Diner , Dust cloud meets me off the twenty or so wheels
on an 18 wheeler ,,,
can't hurt the grime already on me , just another coat added over
an already stiff with filth Jacket ,,
Been road bound now over two weeks , I believe sixteen days , might
be seventeen , not once have I changed out these 501's ,,,

Denim is like that ,, the less you wash it , the longer it last ,,,

and never use Tide detergent on Denim ,,,
Tide cleans by heat ,,,
which as well strips the dye out of the denim , and breaks down the
cotton ,,, turning them into rags ,,,

Woman over on the side of the sign for this joint , seated in a 25 year
old Pontiac ,,, watching me ,,
saw her inside as I entered , she was paying and about to leave ,,
she glanced over at me , gave me an up and down ,, and smiled into my eyes
with " Well,,, and just where did this Stud come from? "

I guess she supposed I was worth a wait see , and find out for herself .

Zipped to the neck the leather , threw the scarf around and tucked it
into the jacket ,, straddled the Bike ,, and she pulled up and stopped in front of me ,,,

She opened with : " Hey ,,, aren't you Tammy's Brother ,, ? "

( I know damned well , there ain't no Tammy , and this woman's done every brother in this area )

I manage a squint into the Sun , and sideways grunt a " Nope "
as I stroke down on the kick stater and fire up .

She thought she had me pinned in I suppose ,, I just cranked the bars right
rolled back , knocked it down in first ,, popped it out of there ,,

is what I think she said , As I passed out and onto the highway .

Dirt comes in a combination of lifestyles ,,,
sometimes it sticks to a jacket
other times it calls you stuck up a$$hole

and sometimes , it's that Burnt Toast under the Grits .

Burning Deserts , ,,, sage ,,, and heat , two miles high and you're
still frying ,,, what damned cause is there in making such a hostile
planet ,,, MAN ,,, give it another try Mr. God ,,, remember buddy ,,,
you're supposed to be a Perfectionist man ,,,
this is just too half A$$ for a perfect God ,,, unless your Throne is missing
Half the seat .

I heard a very old WW I Vet say once ,, " Ya never think , that a Foxhole ,
would look so beautiful ,,,until bullets and bombs chase you into one "

That described how I felt getting out of my family home ,, like ,,,
it was dropping bombs and bullets on my life ,,,,
and the Road out was my Foxhole ,,,
a place to rest and be safe from the crazy people in this world

( another note to Mr. God , which is crazier , Crazy people , or the Crazy God that makes them ? )

I mean , to what are Crazy People purposed ?
Why make them ?

Is it just to add variety ,,, or are crazy people a way for us sane bastards
to tell we are sane ?

never Mind Mr. God , I think I just answered it for myself .

I guess it's odd that ,, well ,,, that the question above came to me ,
between the thought that " Some people are better at blowing Bubbles that they are at Drawing Bubbles ,,, drawing a Bubble is kinda hard for me ,,,,

I just cannot seem to get the 3D image of them correctly ,,,like ,,,

They just keep coming out looking like a circle ,,, no depth .

Kinda like that Woman waiting on me back at the Diner ,,, no depth ,,
just a hollow looking for someone to fill her Void for her .

a Dirty Bubble ? is that how I associate her in life ?

an empty dirty bubble ,,, with a NEED , to be filled by a Man ?

Lonely People , something I never understood , was loneliness ,,, in
other people ,,
Given that I myself ,, fight hard to find a lonely place to be myself
where I am the happiest .

I guess I should try and remember some of those bar jokes for people like her ,,

just to kind of entertain them while I make haste my escape form them .

It's got to be better than just a rude scoot off and being called a stuck up a$$hole ,, though I don't mind that handle at all ,,,, it's just that
sometimes I have to travel back through these spots on the road ,,,

and every once in a while , I do run into someone I pissed off ,, such as her .

No idea why I held a thought of her for so long , maybe I wanted to
be with her , and just thought myself cheap if I did ,,,

Ego ?
Me ?
been said many times , even by me .

Ah well , that's what was happening back there , and out ahead is where I am
headed , so I dropped all thought of her and that snide a$$ statement of hers .

Desert winds are nice when it's very hot out , yet they are nasty when
mixed with sand and you're riding a bike across the desert ,,,
sand-blasted ,,, I've been ,,, and never liked it at all .

I pulled under a Culvert to get out of it until the wind died down a bit .

Shutting the bike down , I heard a weal voice ,,,,

" You're not going to hurt me are you ? "

Female Voice ,, I didn't even want to turn and look ,,,,
this FEAR Sh_t from people over my looks , sick of it to death .

I answered without turning " Ignore I exist , if it helps please , I have no need
to know you're even here , I'm just getting out of the wind a bit "

Names Angie , she said to my bent over ass as I wiped oil from my
rear wheel ,,,

" Nice enough name , short for Angel perhaps ? "

" Angela actually "

How'd your folks settle on the surname " Actually " ,,, that's a bit odd isn't it ?

I heard her snort a giggle ,,, " Last names not actually , it's insanity actually "

" Two last names ? ,,, that's even more odd , try again , I'm beginning to think
I can't trust you behind my back "

" You're a funny man ,, you always talk to people like that ? "

" Like what ? like with my back to them ,,, or with this smoke in
my lips "

" You're not smoking "

" Right you are ,,, not yet I am , gotta light ? "

She steps out and to my side , surprised me ,,, she was closer than I thought
from the sound of her voice ,,

" she lit a match and cupped it ,,,

" Guess I should have a smoke ready before I asked,,, eh ? "

again she snorted
I pulled a smoke and she lit it up
as I said " You always snort like that when amused ? "

This time it was I who got the short " Nope " reply .

" Well , what other noise can you offer when amused then ? "

" Oh , I don't know , sometimes I just hold the giggle in , and that
makes me fart out loud ,,, do you mean that ? "

I turned to her bag ,,, " you travel rather light for a fart'er ,, I'd think you'd
have more preparations with you for the times you really get to giggling "
11-30-2014, 06:32 AM #842
Cynicalabsurdance Member
Posts:9,900 Threads:223 Joined:Feb 2011
Creation ,,, causes some awesome shït ,,,
Evolution perfects that awesome shït

Angiie wasabout half created evolving awesome shït

Inbred ?
Hell who isn't ?

She may have a mother that was closely related to her father
I amy have something like that myself
I know my Dads parents were first cousins
But , only sign of Inbred in me is the fract my head is square around the back and sides
and comes to a point on top
with a nose that's more a lock pick then
a snoot that turns up at the end .

Big Feet I have , just means bigger stink , rather than me having a bigger Unti to plow with .

Angie had some miles on the hitch , you can see this in hitch hikers every where .
They are more weathered then House Bunnies .

Dad accosted his senses often with lustful thoughts
so maybe my sisters are his ,,, and maybe my cousins are too ,,,

and just maybe it didn't matter to any of us enough to sue him for breach of parental contract .

I asked Angie " What manner of Woman hangs out in a culvert ,,, I mean ,,,
am I safe down here with you ? "

Again she snorted ( damn sure wish she'd stop that snortin' )

" I don't bite , and passed my rabies examine even if I did "

" Well ,,, alrighty then ,,, can you assure me that I'm ok to be around ? "

at that question , she moved up and stuck her hands up under my jacket
12-01-2014, 02:59 AM #843
Cynicalabsurdance Member
Posts:9,900 Threads:223 Joined:Feb 2011
and at that move of her's ,

I thought : " TRAP " and spun around watching for her Partner to bat me in the
back of the head ,,,

She laughed a cackle this time ,,

chill to my spine said : " Snap this Creatures Jaw and ride like hell
out of here "

Dust covers

we can have two sorts

One covers an Item to keep the Dust off of it .

The second way to interpreter the term is : " Dust Covers an Item "

that's an example of just how many ways I could interpret her
move to slide her hands under my Jacket .

It was a Dust Cover moment

Trap and or Trick

or ,,,

Just magnetism ,,, and she was putting the make on me .

Dust Covers ,,,
even the mind at times
12-01-2014, 03:33 AM #844
Cynicalabsurdance Member
Posts:9,900 Threads:223 Joined:Feb 2011
A Hard Wind in a Desert , ,,,usually ,,, means a Storm is about
to trounce upon your stupid butt .

Usually ,,,

This overpass was built over a Dry Wash ,, and that wash was about to become
a very Wet Wash ,,

I took Angies ass in both hands and lifted her onto my Hips
saying ,, whatever you're doing under here ,, is about to become
a deeply wet situation for you ,,

smiled at that , and replied : You can tell I'm already wet ?

I mean Woman , that a Flash flood is about to fill this Culvert we're
in , and we have to MOVE ,,,, and MOVE NOW !

I sat Angie on the Bike and crank it up and out of the Culvert ,,

On the Road I looked for the closest shelter ,,,
out a dirt road north of us was an Old abandoned Stone cabin ,,,
about 3 miles out ,,, No time to think about it ,,
Big Warm Desert Drops of rain were already smacking my eyelids HARD ,,

This road would be wet sticky adobe clay in minutes , I hit it up
to about 40mph and hoped we'd not become a skid mark in clay .

I rode right through the front door into the Cabin saying " tuck your legs tight to me ,,,
She jumped off ,,, once inside ,, and said something to me that
was drowned out of hearing by the huge raindrops beating down
on the Tin Roof of the cabin .

Close that Door Ang' , or this place will be a swamp in here .

She slammed the door , yet it resisted the latch up .

I pushed the debris from the jam and got it shut tight ,,

Turning , she repeated her unheard statement to me ,,,

" We left my Back Pack back there "

I cussed ,,, Ok , well where was it exactly ? "

" Up on that steel beam "

" Well shït ,,, maybe it won't get washed out and stay there "
Right now , we need to plug up those windows with something "

Old mattress on the ground and outside i found some more corrugated tin ,,
those got the windows plugged , and I built a fire using the frame of a Box Spring from the bed as fuel .

" Pretty resourceful aren't you ? "

" Uh , yeah , except when it comes to Sex "

She snorted again
" You don't snort during sex do you / " asking her as I pulled the gloves off
my frozen hands .

" Maybe " is all she replied . .

" Well , warmth is important right now , see any wood out there , on
our way in here ? "

" Not really , I was watching the road turn to Mud ,,, and you ? did you
see any ? "

I pried the door open and stepped out into a Wind ,,, that'd strip the paint
off a house in seconds ,,,

" There's a Chicken Coop or something out there ,, I'll bring it in and bust it up "

I ended up kicking most of the way to the cabin ,,, and smashed it apart against the outer wall ,,, flinging the pieces in through the door .

A good half of it went right on the fire ,, the rest to be used sparingly until
I could determine how long this mess would last .

It's really strange to watch temperature in the desert drop from
90% to 35 all in a few minutes ,,, dry heat , then a Thunder Storm
that drenches everything for only a few moments .

Ang' again snuck up and slid her hands up my spine .
12-01-2014, 10:23 PM #845
Cynicalabsurdance Member
Posts:9,900 Threads:223 Joined:Feb 2011
As Raconteur , it sometimes is hard to know where to begin
in events ,,,
yet even harder to know where to end .
For , no end has been reached where life remains active .

Sitting side Saddle on a ride into unseen experiences , can cause such disasters
as those that bring an early end .

I supposed my instincts to survive , has always caused within me the desire to
Straddle the Saddle with eyes forward , in order to best spot those
possible disasters as they approach .

For some, they get a hand dealt to them ,,,
others make some efforts to deal their own fate .

I've lived by both seats , dealer and player .

The woman Angie may have drown in that Culvert that day , if not for me
showing up and taking the reins , driving the two of us to shelter .

My own situation was not exactly all that focused , I'd been riding the drift too
long to have any idea of what a set destination was any longer.

I know I lacked enthusiasm for serious consideration of what future
I may end up with , and seldom did future ever enter my mind ,
It was drift until something caused me to come to a halt .

So far , nothing ever came that caused me concern for much .
Free to drift , as I had designed a lifestyle that afforded a great
deal more freedom than what I saw in other peoples lifestyles .

Pretty soon , I'd find out from Angie , that she as well had her
own self manipulated lifestyle which gave her wide open horizons .

Rolling out the bed rolls and snuggling in to wait out this storm ,
fire lit and working well , we slept almost 9 hours straight .

Waking to a Sun spot across our faces , I got up and made us Coffee
and toasted some bread with Jam and butter , all I had in the gear for food
with exception to a can of Chili , and I was not about to scarf Chilli
at dawn .

Angie rolled hers up , as I set thinking a way out of this short term connection
between us ,, ( Lone rider , and company just ain't a part of my plans )

I asked : "
12-02-2014, 02:06 AM #846
JayRodney ⓐⓛⓘⓔⓝ
Posts:31,885 Threads:1,455 Joined:Feb 2011
popcorn2.gif You asked... hmm.gif chuckle.gif

12-02-2014, 08:49 PM #847
Cynicalabsurdance Member
Posts:9,900 Threads:223 Joined:Feb 2011

I got interrupted by a need by people in wheel chairs who needed
my seat at this coffee shop

and since I ain't all that social to strangers
I just pressed post
rolled up the laptop
and split like a clit with a tit full of zit
12-02-2014, 09:59 PM #848
JayRodney ⓐⓛⓘⓔⓝ
Posts:31,885 Threads:1,455 Joined:Feb 2011

12-03-2014, 09:37 AM #849
Cynicalabsurdance Member
Posts:9,900 Threads:223 Joined:Feb 2011
quote me : and split like a clit with a tit full of zit

HA !

where the hell do I come up with shït like that ?
12-05-2014, 12:30 AM #850
Cynicalabsurdance Member
Posts:9,900 Threads:223 Joined:Feb 2011
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Continue ~~~~~~~~~~~~

I asked Her : " Before this Noah incident , was there a destination
you had in mind , or were you simply going to wing it until something
interesting came along ? "

My Mother used to get this squint to her eyes every time you called
her on one of her lies ,,,
The deviousness in her would come right out of those eyes and display
itself in living blackness .

Angie had that same squint as she thought up an answer .

Some reason , I always hold my breath as I wait on the devious answer to come .
I think it's a defense mechanism I learned from those times with Bad Mommy .

Just a second before I passed out blue faced , Angie coughed up
her answer ,,,

" Actually I was waiting for my boyfriend to come back and pick me up , we had a fight , I jumped out of the Car with my bag and he drove off ,,,
but he always comes back for me ,,,
Now , since I missed his pick up , he probably thinks I hitched a ride "

Ok ,,,was all I'd reply ,,

Sometime when and if you get a chance ,,,
Stand and smell the Desert after a good electrical storm has passed through .

The soil , plants , everything comes alive after sitting dormant sometimes for years .

It smells like LIFE , in the purest form .

The air is filled with those scents ,, the sky is always the bluest you'll ever see it .

Even sadness has it's beauty , and The bleakness of a Desert does the same .

That is always right after a good storm , the desert shows it's appreciation for water as no other ever does ,, for it receives it so seldom .

This was the Bliss of the moment when Angie gave her false reply , I was
wound up in the scents of the Desert coming to Life ,,,

I can take a lie from another with grace , and supposed to myself that
this lie was as one that little grace was required for acceptance .

" Well , since I wrangled you away from your pick up point , I should make it up
and offer you a ride to the next Town at the least "

She would not turn to face me, perhaps her guilt would show for the lie and
she wished not for that to come to being between us .

She whispered something , and I just blurted out , " I imagine it's pretty
difficult to get you to trust a Man after the treatment your Boyfriend has
dealt out to you , ,,, but if you will ,,, try a small measure of trust
where I'm concerned please ,,, here ,,,, and I took her Hand leading her
to the Bike ,,,
" We can mount your gear up front over my bag , ready to go ? "

She gave nothing more then a slight nod to the query and set her gear
over my Bag on the forks , I bungee cord it down tight , she straddled the seat
a Kick and twist , the Bike popped alive like no storm had an effect on it .

We stopped at the Culvert to retrieve her Bag ,
yes , there it swung by one strap ( Lucky )
I took it down for her and she slid the strap over her head , and smiled when I said : Interesting that your bag is the only thing that was not washed away
in there , You have an Angel watching over you "

" Yeah , and you're him "

Uh ,, right .
12-06-2014, 10:48 PM #851
Cynicalabsurdance Member
Posts:9,900 Threads:223 Joined:Feb 2011
In the sudden , you have less time to think it out , so prompt
you must be to decide , right ?

Damn right .

Somewhere between a Dead Rock in a Bar Ditch on old Highway 66 , and
Tehachapi Pass ,, is a Road Side Diner in the Mojave Desert of California ,,

It was here that a prompt decision had to be made concerning when and where
to part company .

Angie was flexible as to when , but where was to be " Moro Bay" on the Coast .

Coming down the Pass into the Valley ,, you have a drive across the Agricultural
Capital of the U.S .

A Flat soulless stretch of an overly stinking commercial interest Valley
with flying insects filling the Air for 100 miles .

Each town in the Valley , has a Homeless drunk population in the
downtown area's of each , that would fill the Nations Asylums easily .

This part of California I have never been fond of driving through .

Only two events ever happen there for me in all my jaunts across it .

A Freaking Cop pulls me over , harasses me , tickets me , and pretty much
rudely runs me out of the Valley with butthurt all over my face .

The other event

I would love to just once , cross that damned Valley without a DRUNKEN BUM
pissing me off with either their begging , whining , or cussing me when
I refuse to give them what they mooch for .

The Bike has a Five Gallon fuel Tank

I have to make a stop somewhere in this Valley to refuel ,, and THAT ,,,

is what the PROMPT decision would be about , I had to think it out
while riding , because where ever it was going to be , it had to be
quick off and quick back on the freeway without Bums or Cops
being in residence .

I picked a Huge Truck Stop , for the fact that the more people ,,,
the more targets the Bums and Cops would have to choose from ,,,

and just maybe , they would both be busy with others , until I could get in ,
fuel it up , and get GONE quick .

Not gonna Happen .
12-07-2014, 12:22 AM #852
JayRodney ⓐⓛⓘⓔⓝ
Posts:31,885 Threads:1,455 Joined:Feb 2011
(10-23-2014, 10:34 AM)Cynicalabsurdance Wrote:  Spooky Tales

Location : Organ Mountains New Mexico

Event : Fine Footsteps , Sans the Body

begin :

Old dirt road , once a portion of connecting Roads to the main Stage Coach Road from Tombstone Az to Lubbock Texas

sitting in the Pick-up on the bank of the dry wash .

Moon lit night and the Mountains rise up in front of The Beepers Puppy and me .

squish squish squish

FOOT STEPS in the wash in front of us .

I start up the truck and spin it around to scan the wash with the headlights

Beepers Ears are up and listening

' What's that Beeps ? "

She barks and a gives out a whimper

so she hears it too .

I get out of the Truck
beepers right behind me and she runs to the bank of the wash
The bottom of the wash is 9 feet below us

the steps walk right in front of us,,,,

or at least the sound of steps crushing down on gavel passes right in front of us .

no impressions of feet prints are being made as the sound passes

I speak up , " Hey Buddy , there's snakes in that Wash man , better climb out "

The Steps stop ,,, a few seconds tick off ,,,

then the steps continue on past the Beeps and me and keep going until the sound of them fades in the distance .../// ?

Beepers the entire time had her eye's glued toward the sound of the steps as they came and went

When I spoke and the steps had stopped , she was looking straight out into the wash in front of us
where the last step had been .

when those steps began again and moved off to our left ,, she watched and moved her head in line with the sound of the steps moving along past us .

I turned to the hood of the truck and set my Tobacco on the hood to roll a Cig ,,

lighting up , I looked out where the steps were last headed ,,,

nothing out there
not even a shadow


Octo and I had a similar experience about two weeks ago! It was... freaky.

12-07-2014, 06:49 AM #853
Cynicalabsurdance Member
Posts:9,900 Threads:223 Joined:Feb 2011
damn , way over there in Finland ?

Those steps sure get around .

maybe in a couple more years ,,,
they'll Visit Ocker
12-07-2014, 10:33 AM #854
nobody Incognito Anonymous
12-07-2014, 09:04 PM #855
Cynicalabsurdance Member
Posts:9,900 Threads:223 Joined:Feb 2011
Sun comes up over the Peaks , and it's a brand new day .

Right ?

Bullcrap !

Too many times has this happen,, that a new day can be claimed , it's all the same ,
Dark splits the light ?

or ,,,
the light splits the dark ?

Either way , time is nothing more than man;s invention , whether to
align activities of man into segments , or just a bad joke he plays
on himself , it's all one continuous linear stream of never ending .

Again , yes once again , I am accosted by a Drunk while stopped
at a town , what day is this ?

It's the same damned day , well it is when the same event recurs over
and over again .

" Hey Bro' , any spare change Man ? "

I reply : " yeah , I got spare change , I use it for food and laundry , NOT freakin' BOOZE,,, and I don't buy anyone BOOZE with the money I WORK my ass
off for "

He snorts a disgust at me and adds " Ya don't gotta be an asshole
about it man "

Yep , same damned day every damned day .

Bums and Cops , wild women , and Mosquitoes , I'm a magnet for them all .

Minus the Wild Women , I equate the rest in the same arena , none of which
do I believe need to exist .

Predators ,,, all of them . draining , assholes ,,, taxing other people .

Sure enough , as this inbred weak drunk screams what an asshole I am ,,
a Highway Patrolman glances over at us ,,,

" What seems to be the problem ? "

I ignore the question from the Cop , and walk inside to pay for the Gas .

Angie is in the bathroom doing her refresh ,,, and the Cop is now wondering what I have to Hide ,,,

Great Balls of shït that roll up hill from the dregs of society ,, damned
asswipe DRUNK !

I get an Idea ,, complain to the clerk about the Drunk , and suggest she go out and tell the Cop that the drunk is hassling her customers , and as she
has the Cops attention ,,, I'll walk up and ride off ,,, come back for Angie after the scene is clean of Cops and Bums .

I walk out behind the clerk , as the Cop points at me and ask ::::::::::::

" Whats going on here ? "
I point to the clerk and reply : " She'll fill you in ,,, he's a bit of a nuisance "

The clerk is between me and the Cop , as he looks at her waiting for
her comments ,, I slid sideways pout from behind her and straddle the Bike
Crank , rev ,,, gone in two and one half seconds .

Up the on ramp , and off at the next off ramp .

I wait beneath the over pass for about 15 minutes ,,, I walked out to look
back at the station just as the Cop rolls out and up the same ramp
I did ,,,,
NOW ! quick , up the ramp headed back the way I came ,,,

Hopefully if he looks across the Highway,,
and see's me headed the other way ,,,,
He'll let it go ,,, and I'm home free .

I hate contact with Cops .

Sure enough , he looks across straight into my face , but a center
divider means he has to go all the way to the offramp I took and get back
on headed my way , by then ,,,,
I should have Angie mounted and GONE .



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