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Dog owners ----dont try this
10-26-2017, 05:34 AM #1
ocker1 Member
Posts:2,239 Threads:908 Joined:Mar 2011
Okay, so, I guess it’s time to tell y’all what happened this morning.
My neighbor has been complaining that our dogs had been barking non-stop, right?
Now I hate those electric zapping bark collars so I found a humane citronella collar for them ... it was explained to me that way when the dog barks, it shoots out a blast of citronella under their nose and supposedly they won’t like it.
So I filled the collar up with the stuff .... and that's where my morning should have ended.
But, no, silly me, decided to see how it works.
So now I'm standing on my back porch "barking" at the collar, right?
I'm like what the hell ... I feel like an idiot... and nothing is happening.
I make sure it's turned on, check the fill level, and go through the "getting started" check list one more time.
So, I bark again .... nothing happens again.
I don't know what possessed me to do this ... but I put the doggone collar around my neck, and then barked.
Apparently, the collar only works if it feels vibrations ... because I immediately received a blast of citronella to my face!!
I was coughing my lungs out which made this stupid collar spray out even more!!!!
Now, I'm basically dying, trying to breathe, jumping around and waving my arms with the dogs looking at me like I’m their new bestest best friend EVER!
So between coughing and yelling for help, and doing jumping jacks ... I've emptied over a dozen blasts of citronella to my face.
Mind You, this whole darn time, I'm trying to get the collar off ... but I'm in such a panic, I can't figure it out.
I finally get the collar off and threw the darn thing half way across the yard, sit in the chair trying to catch my breath and get the smell out of my nose.
Now I smell like a I freaking Tiki Torch.
On the plus side, I probably won't have a mosquito problem for a few days.
And even though this does sound like something I'd do ... LOL ... I hate to break the news that it's a "copied" story that gave me a real good chuckle so feel free to do the same ? too funny not to share...
10-26-2017, 01:31 PM #2
Strigoi Member
Posts:1,646 Threads:84 Joined:Mar 2011
Is this a bourbon legend? chuckle.gif

Un Strigoi printre noi
10-28-2017, 03:31 AM #3
Cynicalabsurdance Member
Posts:10,213 Threads:232 Joined:Feb 2011
well , did you have to go to the Vet ?
10-28-2017, 05:17 PM #4
Kreeper Griobhtha
Posts:10,876 Threads:720 Joined:Feb 2011
(10-28-2017, 03:31 AM)Cynicalabsurdance Wrote:  well , did you have to go to the Vet ?

rofl.gif

I am speaking of the life of a man who knows that the world is not given by his fathers, but borrowed from his children; who has undertaken to cherish it and do it no damage, not because he is duty-bound, but because he loves the world and loves his children… - Wendell Berry, 1971
10-28-2017, 06:17 PM #5
Octo Mother Superior
Posts:40,960 Threads:1,544 Joined:Feb 2011
chuckle.gif



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