I had been watching the local news this morning and by the time it ended I was already perusing the web and ignoring the tv. During that time Today or Good Morning America or one of those sheep shows had come on and they were interviewing Snooki. That was almost enough to simulate a severe stomach virus. Then they showed a clip from what I am assuming is her new show. The clip featured them getting the SSI card for their newborn son. Snooki takes the card and gets excited proclaiming that "now he is officially a human." She then added that now he is officially an American. He can be President! He can be an Olympic!" (Yes, she said, "...an Olympic".)
So, you are not a human until you get your Social Security card...
I am not your rolling wheels, I am the highway
I am not your carpet ride I am the sky
I am not your blowing wind, I am the lightning
I am not your autumn moon, I am the night