#Login Register


  • 0 Vote(s) - 0 Average
Home 


THE AUSSIE VERSION OF CREATION
08-24-2012, 06:49 AM #1
ocker1 Member
Posts:2,028 Threads:789 Joined:Mar 2011

THE AUSSIE VERSION OF CREATION

In the beginning God created day and night.

He created day for footy matches, going to the beach.....

And BBQ's......


He created night for going prawning,
sleeping and BBQ's, and God saw that it was good.


On the Second Day, God created water....for surfing,

swimming, and BBQ's on the beach,
and God saw that it was good.


On the Third Day God created the Earth to bring forth plants

to provide malt and yeast for beer

and wood for BBQs, and God saw that it was good..


On the Fourth Day God created animals
and crustaceans,chops, sausages,
steak and prawns for BBQ's, and God saw that it was good.

On the Fifth day God created a Bloke to go to the footy,

enjoy the beach, drink the beer and eat the meat and prawns at BBQ's,

and God saw that it was good.


On the Sixth Day God saw that the Bloke was lonely

and needed someone to go to the footy, surf, drink beer,

eat and stand around the barbie with.

So God created Mates, and God saw that they were good Blokes,

and God saw that it was good.

On the Seventh Day God looked around at the twinkling barbie fires,

heard the hiss of opening beer cans and the raucous laughter of all the Blokes.

He smelled the aroma of grilled chops and sizzling prawns

and God Saw that it was good .. ...

Well.... Almost good.....

He saw that the Blokes were too tired to clean up and needed a rest.








So God created Sheilas

to clean the house, to bear children,

to wash, to cook and to clean the Barbie,

and then God saw that it was not just good.....

It was better than that, it was Bloody Awesome!

IT WAS AUSTRALIA!!!!!
08-24-2012, 09:20 AM #2
Shadow Mrs. Buckwheat
Posts:12,782 Threads:1,182 Joined:Feb 2011
vic.gif
08-24-2012, 09:28 AM #3
JayRodney ⓐⓛⓘⓔⓝ
Posts:31,276 Threads:1,438 Joined:Feb 2011
rofl.gif That's gonna' be a big hit with the ladies Ocker. 37.gif

wonder.gif
08-24-2012, 09:33 AM #4
ocker1 Member
Posts:2,028 Threads:789 Joined:Mar 2011
crikey, they gotta know, its a "REAL BLOKES " country
08-24-2012, 09:54 AM #5
JayRodney ⓐⓛⓘⓔⓝ
Posts:31,276 Threads:1,438 Joined:Feb 2011
chuckle.gif

wonder.gif
08-24-2012, 10:25 AM #6
Octo Mother Superior
Posts:42,601 Threads:1,469 Joined:Feb 2011
I think it must have been the Wizard of Oz doing shït like that. 13.gif


rofl.gif


08-24-2012, 01:58 PM #7
DaJavoo If looks could kilt
Posts:1,850 Threads:45 Joined:Mar 2011
OMG ~ this one's not gonna be pretty.
08-25-2012, 12:18 AM #8
bohica Member
Posts:1,590 Threads:194 Joined:Feb 2011
I was in Perth in '82, and if I said "excuse me" if I walked in front of a woman/girl, or held a door open for them, they would say to each other "did you hear what he said", or "did you see what he just did?".
Man, basic Human respect went a long way down there.

There's plenty of room for all God's creatures. Right next to the mashed potatoes!
08-25-2012, 12:26 AM #9
Octo Mother Superior
Posts:42,601 Threads:1,469 Joined:Feb 2011
Basic human respect should go a long way everywhere. sad2.gif

A smile and thank you could make somebody's day.
08-25-2012, 12:28 AM #10
Accidental Stoner Member
Posts:8,812 Threads:70 Joined:Feb 2011
(08-25-2012, 12:18 AM)bohica Wrote:  I was in Perth in '82, and if I said "excuse me" if I walked in front of a woman/girl, or held a door open for them, they would say to each other "did you hear what he said", or "did you see what he just did?".
Man, basic Human respect went a long way down there.


Over here, in 2012, they look at you like
you're a potential rapist or sumtin...
but I don't mind.
Always be nice to the ladies. :)
And all other living creatures.

Except mosquitoes.
08-25-2012, 12:35 AM #11
ocker1 Member
Posts:2,028 Threads:789 Joined:Mar 2011
08-25-2012, 01:19 AM #12
bohica Member
Posts:1,590 Threads:194 Joined:Feb 2011
It's OK, pops, Troglodytes are common in Au. You're in NZ, correct?

There's plenty of room for all God's creatures. Right next to the mashed potatoes!
08-25-2012, 01:20 AM #13
bohica Member
Posts:1,590 Threads:194 Joined:Feb 2011

Basic human respect should go a long way everywhere.

All the way to the boudoir, in this case.

There's plenty of room for all God's creatures. Right next to the mashed potatoes!
08-25-2012, 01:21 AM #14
Accidental Stoner Member
Posts:8,812 Threads:70 Joined:Feb 2011
chuckle.gif



Home 




 



DISCLAIMER / Terms of Service (TOS):
Kritterbox.com - Socialize anonymously, commentary, discussion, oddities, technology, music and more!  This website is provided "as is" without warranty of any kind, either expressed or implied. kritterbox.com shall not be liable for any damages whatsoever, including, without limitation, those resulting from loss of use, data or profits, whether or not advised of the possibility of damage, and on any theory of liability, arising out of or in connection with the use or performance of this site or other documents which are referenced by or linked to this site.
This website exists solely for the purposes of exchange of information, communication and general entertainment. Opinions from posters are in no way endorsed by kritterbox.com. All posts on this website are the opinion of the authors and are not to be taken as statements of fact on behalf of kritterbox.com. This site may contain coarse language or other material that kritterbox.com is in no way responsible for. Material deemed to be offensive or pornographic at the discretion of kritterbox.com shall be removed. kritterbox.com reserves the right to modify, or remove posts and user accounts on this website at our discretion. kritterbox.com disclaims all liability for damages incurred directly or indirectly as a result of any material on this website. Fictitious posts and any similarity to any person living or dead is coincidental.
All users shall limit the insertion of any and all copyrighted material to portions of the article that are relevant to the point being made, with no more than 50%, and preferably less of the original source material. A link shall be visible in text format, embedded directly to the original source material without exception.
No third party links, i.e. blogs or forums will be accepted under any circumstances, and will be edited by staff in order to reflect the original source of copyrighted material, or be removed at the sole discretion of kritterbox.com.
Fair Use Notice:
This site may contain copyrighted material the use of which has not always been specifically authorized by the copyright owner. Users may make such material available in an effort to advance awareness and understanding of issues relating to economics, individual rights, international affairs, liberty, science, and technology. This constitutes a 'fair use' of any such copyrighted material as provided for in section 107 of the US Copyright Law. In accordance with Title 17 U.S.C.Section 107, the material on this site is distributed without profit to those who have expressed a prior interest in receiving the included information for educational and/or research purposes.
This Disclaimer is subject to change at any time at our discretion.
Copyright © 2011 - 2017 kritterbox.com