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07-12-2013, 04:37 AM #46
Cynicalabsurdance Member
Posts:8,249 Threads:191 Joined:Feb 2011
It grew from loneliness and a feeling of needing to belong

It soon grew to be a blimp with a personal add
longer then " War and Peace "

It went by the name Talisman , but was really
a Talis Woman in a beard with flat falsies .

I was born on a Greyhound Bus
Between Bakersfield and Visialia

Raised on a Mayonnaise Farm

and went to Modesto Junior High School

When I was young
My face caught afire and my Mom put it out with a rake

At 11 years of age
My Mom would rent me out
to two elderly Gypsy ladies
whom got off on giving little Blond haired Boys
Hot Sauce enemas

So I ran away from home with a heated ass
and joined a traveling freak show

One night I got in a gussle with the He/She Truck Driver
for the troupe
and as it attempted to pierce me with it's nine inch nails
I kicked it in the Gel Sacks it called it's tits

The Silicone shot up It's nose
and hitting it's pea sized brain

Killed it

On the run for my life and burnt asshole
I hid in the trunk of a Ventriloquist

and she being a Drunken slob never noticed
I had switched out the dummy for me .

In one of her skits
her finger poked a hole in my spleen
while her hand was up my ass

and i made a whole paragraph out of swear words

We were fired for offensive material

She flogged me for hours with her hair braid and
I fell in love

we never got married
But she began squirting kids out of her like a Roach
on fertility drugs

after 12 kids
I stated a baker's dozen was a bad omen
and she being a believer in the Occult

plugged her Vag with a 5 gallon bucket of super glue
bucket included .

She died and went straight to hell

I still get emails from her with a dot. hell email addy .

But my Hotmail account has heaven on it's mind and will
not respond to her .

I carved a Life sized effigy of her and ,,,

sometimes when the Moon is full over the bay

and the Wooperwill begins her sad song
I get kinda lonesome for her
and get out the wooden effigy , pull the bucket from it's Vag

and give it a real good tune up with my diddle

IAmComedy Show this Post
07-12-2013, 04:48 AM #47
IAmComedy Incognito Anonymous
 
(07-12-2013, 04:37 AM)Cynicalabsurdance Wrote:  It grew from loneliness and a feeling of needing to belong

It soon grew to be a blimp with a personal add
longer then " War and Peace "

It went by the name Talisman , but was really
a Talis Woman in a beard with flat falsies .

I was born on a Greyhound Bus
Between Bakersfield and Visialia

Raised on a Mayonnaise Farm

and went to Modesto Junior High School

When I was young
My face caught afire and my Mom put it out with a rake

At 11 years of age
My Mom would rent me out
to two elderly Gypsy ladies
whom got off on giving little Blond haired Boys
Hot Sauce enemas

So I ran away from home with a heated ass
and joined a traveling freak show

One night I got in a gussle with the He/She Truck Driver
for the troupe
and as it attempted to pierce me with it's nine inch nails
I kicked it in the Gel Sacks it called it's tits

The Silicone shot up It's nose
and hitting it's pea sized brain

Killed it

On the run for my life and burnt asshole
I hid in the trunk of a Ventriloquist

and she being a Drunken slob never noticed
I had switched out the dummy for me .

In one of her skits
her finger poked a hole in my spleen
while her hand was up my ass

and i made a whole paragraph out of swear words

We were fired for offensive material

She flogged me for hours with her hair braid and
I fell in love

we never got married
But she began squirting kids out of her like a Roach
on fertility drugs

after 12 kids
I stated a baker's dozen was a bad omen
and she being a believer in the Occult

plugged her Vag with a 5 gallon bucket of super glue
bucket included .

She died and went straight to hell

I still get emails from her with a dot. hell email addy .

But my Hotmail account has heaven on it's mind and will
not respond to her .

I carved a Life sized effigy of her and ,,,

sometimes when the Moon is full over the bay

and the Wooperwill begins her sad song
I get kinda lonesome for her
and get out the wooden effigy , pull the bucket from it's Vag

and give it a real good tune up with my diddle


layers exist for reasons known.
IAmComedy Show this Post
07-12-2013, 04:55 AM #48
IAmComedy Incognito Anonymous
 
the wind fire burned many moons in the sky, and only those looking saw what the fire had to say. the smoke makers make smoke not of their own, but the thousands of smoke makers that combine them all.

the messengers of both and all have big pow wow in front of great spirit everyday. both dont like each other, for both remind each other of what is hidden in each other, making them envious, and hateful towards themselves.

if you are paying attention to the smoke maker, you then are just paying attention to something other than yourself, and that which you deny in self. the smoke maker cares not about the feelings of the one looking at smoke, but the smoke itself, and what it has to say.

till this day, every time humans see smoke, they rush to put it out, thereby continuing their problems that bring sorrow.

(sniff sniff)

ok, now get that worthless sum bitch in the grave...
07-12-2013, 05:18 AM #49
Cynicalabsurdance Member
Posts:8,249 Threads:191 Joined:Feb 2011
Born into,,,, instead of born out of , a Societal Woe ,
we become the fractal unit of consciousness
which creates that Societal Woe as a whole .

a Unit , caught up in the whole of fractal units ,
which make the whole of consciousness of all the combined
fractal units , we may attempt to separate our singularity
from the whole ,,,

But as said
No man is an Island

the individual must in some way find peace enough
to maintain a place within the whole
no matter the differences that individual may have with
the other units .

Stuck
yes just a little too stuck to
run away from ourselves

we turn the chin to face the Mirror that
we find our own reflective personal alliance in the whole .

yes, that is us in the mirror
though our finger points away from us
we are there in that " away ",,,, as we are here .

07-12-2013, 05:18 AM #50
UniqueStranger Art in my heart
Posts:14,881 Threads:420 Joined:Jun 2012
(07-12-2013, 03:57 AM)Cynicalabsurdance Wrote:  That ,,, you have to ask her .

She's the one that took the position

and for her reasons
not mine

I am just the Raconteur ,,, savvy ?

chuckle.gif


Your racouteur saavy needs work.
07-12-2013, 05:57 AM #51
Cynicalabsurdance Member
Posts:8,249 Threads:191 Joined:Feb 2011
aaahhhh

you just want to pick chuckle.gif
IAmComedy Show this Post
07-12-2013, 05:59 AM #52
IAmComedy Incognito Anonymous
 
You know, i really love being in idaho. your ƒükkêd springs idaho. greatest town to live in. i promise. well kept secret. you will never know, i assure you.

anyway, in your ƒükkêd springs idaho, is were the great crowds are, you know. the best actually. you the know the ones. they are looking at you intently, with no expression, and then modestly applaud at the end.

i trust these people for some very strange unknown reason. i feel ok about keeping all of my shït in the back of my car, and have it unlocked in the parking lot. i also feel ok about staying at a motel in these places.

i have considered that they are under alien control, and that a martial in a space ship is hovering over my car and force field stealing my weed and prawn mags. or that the government is outside looking through it, and this town is fake, and they are all actors. i mean, the alternative is rather harsh. and i am a really nice guy and all, but "where are my t shirts".

(scene moves outside, to people stealing t shirts out the back of cars)

great. this just makes my day. "working for a living" takes on another whole new meaning, as i think about the ledge again that the birds have been shitting on. yes, yes, "i dont think it can get any worse" seems to not be working.

i think back (visual screen display of random blurry images) of all the things that lead to this moment, and all that fills my head is movie titles, song lyrics, and who was the girl of the year for playboy for 10 years straight. wow.

you know these people. any song, or movie, they know (closes distance with mic) EVERYTHING about it? and after hearing only 5 minutes pf ta;l from them, you know everything about it as well, and no longer even need to watch the movie, listen to the song, or read the book?

uh huh.

these are the same people that are probally know saying 'yes we know, we have already heard this, and then proceed the cite where, when, etc.' i dont have a tv, and only keep up with events online, so excuse me for not being fresh. maybe there will come a point finally where no one talks anymore, for everything is known instantly, and then a full mutation can occur to the plastic bag human thing blob, that is no longer needed but for processors of shït.

Sanitary waste management. has a nice ring to it.

(people start running up to stage for t shirts)

hey hey hey, behave yourselves you civilized shït compactors. one at a time. im sorry you were in the bathroom when they were handed out.

(one woman come up to talk directly to the comedian)

yes, i suppose it could be a charity. yes. uh huh.

(Voice from the theater management booms loudly on crappy speakers)

ok fleas, back to your seats. by the way, when you were using the restroom, at the beginning, we lined the toilet seat with STD's, and yes, the government already knows, they were watching, using the cameras that are secretly installed in the building. That is all.

what the ğck was that? the midget?

spooks these days you know?

not like the old days when you had to work for it. nope.

now days its because people are so board, that they must spy on others.

yeah. its true.

i mean, why else would anyone be so tired of themselves to focus on, that they would need to go outside of themselves because of that boredom.

i tell you what, not me, i could spent forever in here, and still be lost.

with this much found why be found? found equals (mic increase) BOOOORRRING.......snort....cocaine...

yeah man, thats it, nice pick me up off the floor.

(grins at someone near front) thanks for that during the break....

lmao.gif

(cell phone rings)

So, you are not going home with me tonight? why not? oh, well, thats perfectly normal on the first date. yeah, and? oh, you dont like saddles? Isnt that merry go round in england? what? i have to go, yes, well i was going to talk to you further, but have "decided" i am in the middle of something. no! not that. but....ğck you to, goodbye!

(grins sheepishly at crowd for a few seconds)

yes, well, at least this time nothing was damaged, and i have a alibi, even though it might be only one other person.

the prison guards dont count.

lmao.gif

this is pathetic, i am having to hold up my own "laugh now" signs.

lmao.gif

ok, seriously, you know, that its bad, whenever all the ashes in an ash trey look like a couple ounces of nuggish weed.

yeah, someone comes in and says "can i change your ashtray", and the next thing i know, the house is turning on its side.

never mind cartons, ill take a crate. the full flavor kill me picker upper that rides a horse, of course.

that makes me want to kill myself so bad, looking at that sexy man ride that horse. uh huh. that cowboy hat is to die for(puffs hard on cigarette.) oh wait, its supposed to be the other way for men, right. i just wish i could ride a horse and kill myself as good as he can, maybe the women will ride me more.

or how about the green minty flavor, that is sooooo "Kcooooool" and maybe if you smoke them you will get laid while drinking yourself at the bar. (waves at all the bar flies hanging out at the bar in the theater while making drunk sloshing noises with the mouth) drinking.gif

thats my crowd. you other scout comics out there know me when you see me doing the same, but dont think i am who you think i am. ğkking perverts are what you are. comedic perverts whom fetish is stalking other comics. I know this because I am you, i am your father. Now I command you to forget everything you have heard for the next 450 days. beerbong.gifuhoh.gifyay.gif

Ok, so, back to smoking, and the fact that smokers like killing themselves because it feels good.

it feeeeeeels good.

just like working out 5 times a day, for 3 hours a day, years on years end, and then having a heart attack and dying for it, feeeeeeels good. i hope we have understanding now, and that we are no threat to the trees.

(lights cigarette)

(someone from crowd says) " you know how many African babies it took to make that cigarette?"

Hearing what I hear from virgin, there might have been about 10 million sperms in that cigarette, and you are worried about Africa, what happened to no child left behind?

ğkking abortionist, using the outcasts are fertilizer to grow crops for the children, and look, this is what happened. Its all your fault Mrs. Brady.







07-12-2013, 06:18 AM #53
UniqueStranger Art in my heart
Posts:14,881 Threads:420 Joined:Jun 2012
You met your match in rhetoric here Rog. Sorry 'urnotcomedy' but I don't get it...where's the comedy?
07-12-2013, 06:55 AM #54
Cynicalabsurdance Member
Posts:8,249 Threads:191 Joined:Feb 2011
Unique,,, been drinking ?

you're being a picker

pick on me

pick on them

pick
pick
pick

Imcomedy is funny
in a satirical revealing way

Humans , like Monsters , never like to laugh at their misbehavior .

Delivered however in person with the right inflection

His material would crack you up .
07-12-2013, 07:13 AM #55
UniqueStranger Art in my heart
Posts:14,881 Threads:420 Joined:Jun 2012
Very well, I'll leave you two alone. damned.gif
IAmComedy Show this Post
07-12-2013, 07:37 AM #56
IAmComedy Incognito Anonymous
 
oh great crowd, the best actually.

now lets get to some serious subjects. like masturbation. yes, the masturbatory nature of the human existence.

just think, men, of all the possible seed you have spread over your lives, and that since there is little difference in a sperm cell and any other cell, you have been laying the frame work for yourself in future lives someplace, is the vast ocean of potentials, that are yet now, swirling all around us.

I feel willy wonka coming on, particularly the scene "wonka vision".

Anyway, yes, your every thought, saying, action, etc, is ejaculation upon the physical existence.

Im sorry, i dont have any more shirts you greedy bastards.

Women on the other hand masturbate to no avail, because no matter how hard they try, that finger is not going to get them pregnant.

Testing, testing, can you hear me now?

Just the very fact that Humans have created "ğck machines", is great testament to the sexual frustrations of the human species.

(midget comes back out on stage and says "i thought i told you about this last night", and then exits)

You know, i heard about this place a long time ago, but wasnt poor enough to show up. Things have obviously changed. Now deal with it, or i will take my shoes off. Oh yeah, well lets just say the thing the government has been looking for all this time while searching your shoes at the airport, lives in my shoes, and is a threat to the entire existence of humanity on planet earth. Oh, you are a technical lass arent ya, well the last sentence qualified, would suggest human life on other planets, yes.

(radio signal from deep space appears)

"Nutmeg command to Alpha asshole 1, over"

(Alpha asshole 1) "go head nutmeg command".

(nutmeg command) "has earth improved? are they still using money? solved the war issue? learned to feed themselves? have they learned the other basic principles of balanced existence, over?"

(Alpha asshole 1) "negative nutmeg command", there are few that think they can, but never do.

(nutmeg command) oh, so they still think they have to think about it further still? good heavens, is this going to take another 10 thousand years?"

Im not really sure the accuracy of these statements, though the website had sources. so believe at your own risk. ohhh, what a day, what a day. i saw you played around at your job all day, and spent over 2 bucks on vending machines items. you know you said you were going to cut down on that, and loose the twinky weight. what the hell, go all out, when there is nothing going on, and you have to win at something.

on the other hand, taking a nap sounds really good. i mean, its really hard to have two jobs, when one is a comedian, and the other a spy for a planet 50 million light years away.

life just isnt fair. be thankful you are not a mouse, and live like the next life you are going to be a mouse.

yep, uh huh. gosh, you are really setting those standards high.

i came, i saw the end, and i have now decided to be a mouse. ğck it.

im going to hell?

now really?

ive live in texas, no air conditioning, and work out side, and you mean to threaten me with hell? BOOOOOOOOMMMMMM!!!! Sorry folks, clean up on node 31197, clean up on node 31197.

(voice from the ceiling again, that is presumed to be the midget) "folks, the bright flash and light you just saw, and the spray of what you think is blood, was not a bright flash of light, or blood, but however this is, and you will not remember anything from this point forward. (amazing bright light in the entire theater).

did i fall asleep again?

(screaming of terror and laughter from audience)

did i say some crazy shït again while asleep? yeah, my wife complains about that alot, but i never take her seriously.

(from crowd- "what the ğck is going on")

did someone steal your t shirts?

(mad booooing from the crowd)

oh, so there really was shït under your seats?

(people in the crowd start rushing the stage to lay hands on comedian)

Oh shït, what did i say now!!

(turns and runs down into the under belly of the theater, and for some reason images from phantom of opera appear in his head")

(It is now weeks later, and a child lays in bed, recovering nicely from his sickness.)

(the mom)

i have to go to work now, but you stay in today, and get some sleep. be sure to eat the vegetables and fruit i picked from the garden.

(the child) but if i stay inside, i will not get well, and must be outside again, playing in the mud and the rain.

(the mom) son, there is no more rain, and no more gardens, our is one of the only that survived in the area, stay inside and get better, i must go to work now.

(the mom leaves the childs room, taking a quick glance, as she turns, and closes the door behind her)

(The child sleeps again)

(2 months pass)

The child is seen walking, thinking, and talking to himself, about matters of import of the day. It is a cool spring, and all the trees, flowers, and grass are fresh, and everything is as it should be, or so it was as told to be should it.

A scent of girls smell passes the imagination, upon which the entire walk was secretly fashioned around. His hopes and dreams of taking his armor off, is plastered in threaded word, so perfectly clear, as to articulate its essence into being, but somehow.

Many years ago, on these very shores of to and fro, there was such a time, as all the searchers have found in time. They are the never finding, but ever looking. The truly unsatisfied souls. Looking for the place where the armor lays, for everything has its place, so they say.

The child, seeing this in his mental thoughts, knew what lay ahead, once the armor is put on, but alas, such is the way of knights.

What prevented this child from becoming so?

(phone rings again)

this was about to get terribly interesting, but i have to take this.

hello? uh huh. ok. well yes, i am still looking for a contextual structuralist. oh you do. i see. oh they are? im sure it is. mmm.... yes. uh huh. i cant wait either and will be thinking about it.

(hangs up phone)

dont you want to know.....

lets just say its easy to get volunteers these days. yeah, back in the old days we had to do it the hard way, you know. work for it.

anyway, after that conversation, i cant remember what the hell i was talking about, and thats probably for the best at this point.

(vision blurs)

you know what really scorns my nipples?

people who state with such pride "i work to put food on the table"..

i cant stand these people.

they could grow their own food and claim the same thing, but something is different about this ones.

growing their own food would negate the reason for going to their jobs.

so its something else.

lets see. a boat. fancy tv and music system. jet skies. big houses. fancy cars. gmo's that are packaged with labels that read "organically grown". to pay for bombs to drop on people. to have people lie to them. people to steal from them. to be raped and pillaged until there is nothing left of their memory even.

that is the reason for going to work. cut out the middle man, and grow a ğkking garden.

humans, love em or hate em, are an interesting lot. little ants, on a little ant hill, amounts many other ant hills, that form a village of ant hills called a galaxy. aint it grand?

have you figured out yet you are being ƒükkêd ? oh. well take this pill, and sit in front of the tv, until it feels better.

i have seen crazy shït in this world man, crazy shït.

like the other day, in some side alley of the city, a hot dog vendor was selling hot dogs to a family of rats, near 29th and park. the same vendor also has conversations with em. you know, like the "family type" conversations, and all. i mean come on, of course this shït is crazy. think wat ahh be puttin in the hot dogs man. think about it.....

ok, so the fire wind is raging hot tonight, as "sweet home alabama" plays in the background of course. summer grilling just aint the sane without it.....

(chuckle of duration)








IAmComedy Show this Post
07-12-2013, 08:54 AM #57
IAmComedy Incognito Anonymous
 

(catchy tune sang)
"i lived in bama a long time ago, back when the smoke used to roll, along, the mighty get along.

oh yeah, them those days yonder go, over the mountains and through the snow, them get along days.

perching and preaching like osho but to arrive at the big zero, in those get along days.

yay haw, you high, just dont stick that needle in your eye, in this get along days."

Remember when? Its been a long long time friend. now there is just a rash, where the saddle used to be, back in the days of chasing glory with glee.

you found glory out back, raped full of smut sacks, and decided that you leave that be.

oh yeah, its real time, though you still peek behind the line, in these them get along days.

get along time to be doing the wrong rimes on stages built by men.

from here out there will be never a time again for these things, as its end is ruin.

(the midget, with two sisters, come on stages ridding stick horses around comedian and then exit)

Ok......

I know its past closing time. But i usually practice until the next morning.

Oh, what tune would you like to hear?

speak up..

(someone from the crowd) "the sound of music"!

Im going to take 24 hours off to think about, will get back to you on this.

(a week later)

(while in san francisco, the comedian stops at 11th eliisar, and william dames, apartment 222.

(rings door bell- Answers Todd Cleminsl)

(Mr. Clemins answers and says ) Yes, may I help you?

Well hello, how are you?

(Mr. Clemins) Fine, how are you, why are you here?

I dont know about this "you", you speak of, but "i", am doing fine.

(Mr. Clemis looks confused while looking at the stranger at the door and says) Do you know me from somewhere, and again asks about the purpose of being here.)

Know you? thats funny. wow, this grammar structuralist is really working things out.

(Mr. Clemis looks up from thinking, suddenly, seemingly more confounded to the strange at the door, and says)Oh, so it appears you use the internet often.?.

I have not had a computer in 10 years is the reply.

(the thinking stops)

ok, yes, after thought, here is the song of "MUSIC", a;oeia;oweia;owvhawe89a[809ha[w0ehvfa8wergha[wergh8awe0r89gfah[weg809hawer0g89h[s0vnr0g8ar[0v8brgv8ah[erwg809ar[0ha[erwgr[0g89hr[g0har[g0hr[g08rhg[0r8hg[0a8rhg[0ar8 (can only be translated by verbal communication)

that is the sound of music rich and poor cocksuckers. do you need another demonstration?

the ğkking sound of music...... really......(the grammar consultant straightening things out).............(medium taps on microphone) (yeah, I like you reading this after it happened)

...... . ... ... . ... ..

No, I am not going home!! I live here. I remember now, those flashes of images in my head about phantom of the opera now. Yeah. shït, that means i sleep in shït.

Oh, well, such is the sacrifice of the one who works for soup cans. la de da, oh look a animal running across the floor. One of huamnities most precious and favorite past time. "Squishing the bug"!!

Yeah, as in "squishing the bug" wit the bottom of the heel.

What was the major crime?

Being there.

Yeah, so just humans are, the royal shining example of justice, that every child even, and some adult wimps, engage in with glee.

Yes, glee.

Notice stage front evidence number 1.

(a cage full of grass hoppers is opened above the crowd)

(crowd is screaming bloody hell, and stomping their feet in mad abandon)

You see?

(heckling and shouts of delusion erupt from the crowd, and they all move forward)

(the goons and the midget come out on the stage and below it to keep the animals from all killing each other with stomping feet.)

(the midget said "now calm down, or you know what happens next, as we release the flying red dildo for all of you to suck on)

(instant calm again returns to the crowd, as just the thought of such threat induced enough sexual arousal in them to keep them docile.)

Yeah, dont you love when a good script comes together? Now get off me, i need a smoke.












IAmComedy Show this Post
07-12-2013, 09:37 AM #58
IAmComedy Incognito Anonymous
 
is there anyone here that has ever been to boys town?

well, you know, it is 1:03, on the 12th of the 7th, 2013, so you know, all the well druken ruff necks are only here now.

Yeah, well anyway, ole boys town. but not the typical trip to boys town.

nope, just the grit trip. thats right.

there were old tales of these trips long ago, from the lipan traders, and the Spaniards, as well as the the azteccas.

yes. many moons ago.

it was called then "the ghost trip".

the travelers on the ghost trip never returned to the same time that they left. they were lost on the seas of the cosmos.

a long time ago, there was a great war that took place all around the earth, and from all 12 directions. the ghost riders ride into and back to that time, and observe, and then bring the information back to earth. this has been going on since the beginning of humanity.

one day, there was a rider who saw far, and indeed what he saw was always true. for many moons what was seen was always what was seen, but one day what was seen was never seen before.

it is of the "white ghost", who rides every electron, and that the white ghost hunts the living to consume them. The white ghost is the energy, and the black ghost is the physical matter.

when ghosts have babies, the two become one. and humans wonder why they are so consumed with each other.

(from the crowd, "go meddle someone elses undies".)

did i ruin your religious experience? here, try again. am i still on the phone?

No, honest truth, there was a time, i dated a girl that i met while in texas, that took me to stay at her house, and then asked me to leave not but 40 minutes after arriving for not hitting on her fast enough.

when you start winning for loosing like that, you might as well find another hobby.

i took up jacks.

and what is cool, is that now, the jack me offs, dont bother me.

(keep smoking the pot someone in the crowd says)

Yeah, yeah thanks, thanks for reminding me, ğkking headcase.

(pulls out bong on stage, and lights up and gargles)

sorry, my VTD. doctor wrote out the script, go bitch to him. and you cops i see appearing at the door, this is for you awful retentive morans. (blows smoke their way, as they start frisking the bar flied for weapons) ğkking pigs!

oh but look, there is one female office that is smiling.

(phone rings)

oh, hold on, gotta take this

speak...

(looks over quickly at cop standing by dïckheads frisking a bunch of drunk comedians)

(charlies brown voices from phone, unintelligible)

Oh really, you would really do that to me?

(charlies brown voices from phone, unintelligible)

uh hummm....(blushing) how many miles per hour is the speed limit now?

(charlies brown voices from phone, unintelligible)

oh really, that high huh? lots of speedy assholes arent there?

(charlies brown voices from phone, unintelligible)

They have those things in prison now?

(charlies brown voices from phone, unintelligible)

I see. Well, you know my number obviously, and i want stake sauce on my salad tonight.

(charlies brown voices from phone, unintelligible)

Ok, beat the shït out of someone tonight with your nightstick for me, so I can watch it on cops, and finally have a tv fetish.

(charlies brown voices from phone, unintelligible)

(hangs up)

yeah, thats not even the half of my sex life, the other half is classified for the protection of the public.

what you never have been to dennys and heard these types of conversations late at night?

how about shopping the clothes sections at walmart at 3 oclock in the morning?

dont ask. but the conversation is stored safely in the walmart computer bunkers for entertainment purposes.

let me tell ya, existing is tiresome. this much is known by man. having a job that depends on the observation of itself, is a rather shitty job you know. you never get a ƒükking break, and the soup taste like shït ,and no one wants to here your side of the story.

now ğck off i have better things to do.

maybe i should go row a boat, that usually works.

or fly fishing in a pond in winter time. that sounds like much more fun.

hey, did you hear about obama wanting to make illegals citizens. talk about some shitty karma for taking the Indians land, and notice how the Christians dont mention the issue of generational sin of fathers being passed down to sons and daughters.

nope, that is a subject of sterilization in the memory hole, but keep clinging to the object they killed jesus with.




07-12-2013, 09:44 AM #59
JayRodney ⓐⓛⓘⓔⓝ
Posts:31,276 Threads:1,438 Joined:Feb 2011
People wold not believe the conversations they can hear at Denny's at 3:00 or 4:00 in the morning after the bars close. rofl.gif

wonder.gif
IAmComedy Show this Post
07-12-2013, 10:04 AM #60
IAmComedy Incognito Anonymous
 
(07-12-2013, 09:44 AM)JayRodney Wrote:  People wold not believe the conversations they can hear at Denny's at 3:00 or 4:00 in the morning after the bars close. rofl.gif


im telling ya. im the guy in the corner, dressed in black, taking notes.



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