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Trump Picks Alex Jones As New Press Secretary
06-22-2017, 06:36 AM #1
Ninelives Singing In The Rain
Posts:2,742 Threads:42 Joined:Feb 2016
Trump Picks Alex Jones As New Press Secretary


WASHINGTON, D.C.—Confirming the widespread rumors that Sean Spicer would be departing the office in short order, President Donald Trump has chosen InfoWars chief and renowned conspiracy theorist Alex Jones as the new Press Secretary, the White House announced Tuesday.

The fiery Jones wasted no time getting in front of the cameras, holding his inaugural press conference shortly after the announcement.

“I am the new Press Secretary!” he bellowed in his distinct Texas growl at all the reporters present, occasionally taking a handkerchief out of his pocket to dab perspiration from his red face. “AAAAAaaaaaaAAAAAAHHHHH!” he continued, beating his chest like a gorilla.

“We’re comin’ for ya globalists! 1776 will commence, you wicked, wicked devils!” he added, before mumbling something about gay frogs.

Press Secretary Jones concluded the conference early, dismissing every person in the room after announcing that only InfoWars and Breitbart reporters would be allowed to attend press events from this point forward.


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Anonymous Kritter Show this Post
06-22-2017, 07:26 AM #2
Anonymous Kritter Incognito Anonymous
Someone is bored af...
06-22-2017, 07:52 AM #3
Ninelives Singing In The Rain
Posts:2,742 Threads:42 Joined:Feb 2016
(06-22-2017, 07:26 AM)Anonymous Kritter Wrote:  Someone is bored af...

Look Up
06-22-2017, 08:19 AM #4
Octo Mother Superior
Posts:41,392 Threads:1,584 Joined:Feb 2011
ffs chuckle.gif
06-22-2017, 08:29 AM #5
Ninelives Singing In The Rain
Posts:2,742 Threads:42 Joined:Feb 2016
(06-22-2017, 08:19 AM)Octo Wrote:  ffs  chuckle.gif


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Random German Guy Show this Post
06-22-2017, 10:57 AM #6
Random German Guy Incognito Anonymous
I suggest Charles Manson.
06-22-2017, 11:44 AM #7
Kreeper Griobhtha
Posts:11,115 Threads:770 Joined:Feb 2011
I suggest Ted Nugent.

What politics from both sides wants to teach us is that things are never complex. If you have your little package and something doesn't fit into that package, You don't know what to make of it so you want to dismiss it or then you will have to do the work of reconsidering your assumptions. - Michael Malice
06-22-2017, 04:36 PM #8
Meh Member
Posts:1,161 Threads:46 Joined:Apr 2017
I suggest Giorgio Tsoukalos.
06-22-2017, 05:02 PM #9
Cynicalabsurdance Member
Posts:10,545 Threads:240 Joined:Feb 2011
Outside of myself ,, I doubt there's a Person , that , as P-S , could with all due Vitriolic ,
shut up annoying reporters , qualm the Histrionics of Brain Damaged Whine Puppies
of the Liberal Slanted Press , and get the Facts out to the Public .

so , My Hat's in the circle .

if it's picked ,
I promise you , 5 minutes with me in the Ring ,, and all those Nancies will forever be retired .

That's first on my List

Next on that List

do away with all attempts by the Press to keep the People off Balance with the FEAR DOPE they feed
the Public .

Last on the List

Leave this World a Better Place to live than when I came into it .

After all , although I have no Offspring ,,, yours must have a World of Decency .

and I'd be working to gain that for them . not for myself , and not for the Worms ,,,
but for your children and theirs to come ...

wadda ya say , do I get your Vote ?

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Anonymous Kritter Show this Post
06-22-2017, 05:28 PM #10
Anonymous Kritter Incognito Anonymous
Mr. Bean would be enjoyable chuckle.gif
06-22-2017, 05:31 PM #11
JayRodney ⓐⓛⓘⓔⓝ
Posts:30,203 Threads:1,487 Joined:Feb 2011
chuckle.gif Yeah, but Bill Shatner for the drama.


06-22-2017, 05:37 PM #12
US nli Incognito Anonymous
(06-22-2017, 07:52 AM)Ninelives Wrote:  
(06-22-2017, 07:26 AM)Anonymous Kritter Wrote:  Someone is bored af...

Thank goodness we'll always have alcohol for self-medication and normalizing socializing and now some of us will have recreational marijuana banana.gif - it just gets better and better. chuckle.gif
06-22-2017, 07:40 PM #13
Cynicalabsurdance Member
Posts:10,545 Threads:240 Joined:Feb 2011
(06-22-2017, 05:28 PM)Anonymous Kritter Wrote:  Mr. Bean would be enjoyable  chuckle.gif

Cheech and Chong ,
with Benny Hill as State Department Head .

My Cousin Hank Williams Jr. as Liver inspector .

Fish and Game should be under Moose and Squirrel

Adams Family , Uncle Fester for F.B.I. director ,,, he'll get to the bottom of Hillary .
smell and all ,,, he'll get there .
06-22-2017, 09:11 PM #14
JayRodney ⓐⓛⓘⓔⓝ
Posts:30,203 Threads:1,487 Joined:Feb 2011
(06-22-2017, 04:36 PM)Meh Wrote:  I suggest Giorgio Tsoukalos.


And Erich von Däniken for German ambassador. rofl.gif


06-22-2017, 10:47 PM #15
Accidental Stoner Member
Posts:8,599 Threads:80 Joined:Feb 2011
Hop Suisse!

You Switzers just got dissed in public again lmao.gif

Erik is 82 now, still going wrong, they say 13.gif



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