But that's what happened around 7 a.m. as she drove her red BMW by the intersection of Southeast 7th and Morrison.
A man dressed in chain-mail with a helmet, shield and carrying a sword and staff ran into traffic and started attacking her car.
She called 911, reporting that "a pirate" was attacking her car.
Read more: http://www.katu.com/news/local/Womans-ca...l?mobile=y
The suspect was cited for criminal mischief & taken to Providence Hospital. Oh and BTW, did I mention he was tripping on acid?