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for those imigrating to Aussie
09-09-2016, 08:11 AM #1
ocker1 Member
Posts:2,028 Threads:789 Joined:Mar 2011
Diary of a Pom in Western Australia


August 31

Just got transferred with work from Leeds UK to our new home in Karratha, Western Australia. Now this is a town that knows how to live! Beautiful, sunny days and warm, balmy evenings. I watched the sunset from a deckchair by our pool yesterday. It was beautiful. I’ve finally found my new home. I love it here.


September 13

Really heating up now. It got to 31 today. No problem though. Living in air-conditioned home, driving air-conditioned car. What a pleasure to see the sun every day like this. I’m turning into a sun-worshipper – no blasted rain like back in Leeds!!


September 30

Had the back yard landscaped with tropical plants today. Lots of palms and rocks. No more mowing lawns for me! Another scorcher today, but I love it here. It’s Paradise!


October 10
The temperature hasn’t been below 35 all week. How do people get used to this kind of heat? At least today it’s windy though. Keeps the flies off a bit. Acclimatizing is taking longer than we expected.

yutiyr

October 15
Fell asleep by the pool yesterday. Got third degree burns over 60% of my body. Missed three days off work. What a dumb thing to do. Got to respect the old sun in a climate like this!

yutiyr

October 20
Didn’t notice Kitty (our cat) sneaking into the car before I left for work this morning. By the time I got back to the car after work, Kitty had died and swollen up to the size of a shopping bag and stuck to the upholstery. The car now smells like Whiskettes and cat shït. I’ve learned my lesson though: no more pets in this heat.


October 25
This wind is a bastard. It feels like a giant ƒükking blow dryer. And it’s hot as hell! The home air conditioner is on the blink and the repair man charged $200 just to drive over and tell me he needs to order parts from ƒükking Perth ….The wife & the kids are complaining.


October 30
The temperature’s up around 40 and the parts still haven’t arrived for the ƒükking air conditioner. House is an oven so we’ve all been sleeping outside by the pool for 3 nights now. Bloody $600,000 house and we can’t even go inside. Why the hell did I ever come here?


November 4
Finally got the ğkking air-conditioner fixed. It cost $1,500 and gets the temperature down to around 25 degrees, but the humidity makes it feel about 35. Stupid repairman. ğkking thief.


November 8
If one more smart bastard says ‘Hot enough for you today?’ I’m going to ƒükking throttle him. ƒükking heat! By the time I get to work, the car radiator is boiling over, my ƒükking clothes are soaking ƒükking wet and I smell like baked cat. ƒükking place is the end of the Earth.


November 9
Tried to run some errands after work, wore shorts, and sat on the black leather upholstery in my car. I thought my ğkking arse was on fire. I lost 2 layers of flesh, all the hair on the backs of my legs and off my ğkking arse. Now the car smells like burnt hair, fried arse and baked cat. ğck . ğck . ğck .


November 10
The Weather report might as well be a ƒükking recording. Hot and sunny. Hot and sunny, Hot and ƒükking sunny. It never ƒükking changes! It’s been too hot to do anything for 2 ƒükking months and the weatherman says it might really warm up next week. ƒück !


November 15
Doesn’t it ever rain in this damn ƒükking place? Water restrictions will be next, so my $5,000 worth of palms might just dry up and blow into the ƒükking pool. The only things that thrive in this ƒükking hell-hole are the ƒükking flies. You don’t dare open your mouth for fear of swallowing half a dozen of the little bastards!


November 20
Welcome to HELL! It got to 45 ƒükkin’ degrees today. Now the air conditioner’s gone in my car. The repair man came to fix it and said, ‘Hot enough for you today?’ I wanted to shove the ƒükking car up his ƒükking arse. Anyway, had to spend the $2,500 mortgage payment to bail me out of jail for assaulting the stupid prick. ƒükking Karratha! What kind of sick, demented ƒükking idiot would want to live here!


December 1
WHAT!!!! The FIRST day of Summer!!!! You are ğkking kidding me!
09-09-2016, 03:17 PM #2
UniqueStranger Art in my heart
Posts:14,881 Threads:420 Joined:Jun 2012
doom.jpg

I'll keep the four seasons, thank you very much.

09-09-2016, 05:19 PM #3
Octo Mother Superior
Posts:42,587 Threads:1,469 Joined:Feb 2011
Thank goodness for the cold and dark...


damned.gif
09-09-2016, 07:18 PM #4
bohica Member
Posts:1,590 Threads:194 Joined:Feb 2011
(09-09-2016, 05:19 PM)Octo Wrote:  Thank goodness for the cold and dark...


damned.gif

Baloney.
I'll take hot any day over cold.

There's plenty of room for all God's creatures. Right next to the mashed potatoes!
09-09-2016, 07:42 PM #5
Octo Mother Superior
Posts:42,587 Threads:1,469 Joined:Feb 2011
Would you really? 13.gif

There are blankets and sweaters when it's cold. What do you do when it's too warm? Just look at Florida!

batboy.jpg
failboat Show this Post
09-09-2016, 07:52 PM #6
failboat Incognito Anonymous
 
so the guy didn't encounter anything poisonous that tried to kill him? blink.gif
09-09-2016, 08:19 PM #7
Octo Mother Superior
Posts:42,587 Threads:1,469 Joined:Feb 2011
Drop bears and dingoes everywhere! Fukn crikey!

scream.gif
09-10-2016, 01:03 AM #8
Screaming Yellow Zonkers Member
Posts:2,706 Threads:265 Joined:Apr 2013
Cold and dark!

aaah2.gif
09-10-2016, 03:52 AM #9
White Ribbon call me
Posts:9,779 Threads:371 Joined:Apr 2013
Cold is best.

Hasnt Ocker posted this before?

blonde.gif
09-10-2016, 04:05 AM #10
Nomadic Wanderer Member
Posts:430 Threads:52 Joined:Aug 2015
i would love to move to Australia or NZ, but the cost of living there is perpendicular to something out of my grasps.
09-10-2016, 04:10 AM #11
Nomadic Wanderer Member
Posts:430 Threads:52 Joined:Aug 2015
(09-09-2016, 03:17 PM)UniqueStranger Wrote:  doom.jpg

I'll keep the four seasons, thank you very much.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GRxofEmo3HA

The four seasons.


09-10-2016, 05:37 AM #12
ocker1 Member
Posts:2,028 Threads:789 Joined:Mar 2011
this was Whitey before he had "the Change "

İmage
09-10-2016, 11:49 AM #13
Ozzie Incognito Anonymous
 
We make every effort to keep the tourists and immigrants out. But still they come



09-10-2016, 11:53 AM #14
Ozzie Incognito Anonymous
 


09-10-2016, 11:55 AM #15
Ozzie Incognito Anonymous
 
İmage



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