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01-21-2013, 03:07 AM #1
ocker1 Member
Posts:2,083 Threads:802 Joined:Mar 2011
An elderly Italian man who lived on the outskirts of Rimini,
Italy,went to the local church for confession.
When the priest slid open the panel in the confessional, the
man said: Bless Me, Father for I have sinned. ... During
World War II, a beautiful Jewish woman from our neighbourhood
knocked urgently on my door and asked me to hide her from the
Nazis. So I hid her in my attic."
The priest replied: "That was a wonderful thing you did, and
you have no need to confess that."
"There is more to tell, Father... She started to repay me with
sexual favours. This happened several times a week, and sometimes
twice on Sundays." The priest said, "That was a long time ago and
by doing what you did, you placed the two of you in great danger.
But two people under those circumstances can easily succumb to
the weakness of the flesh. However, if you are truly sorry
for your actions, you are indeed forgiven."
"Thank you, Father. That's a great load off my mind.
I do have one more question."
"And what is that?" asked the priest.
"Should I tell her the war is over?''
01-21-2013, 03:28 AM #2
Octo Mother Superior
Posts:43,017 Threads:1,474 Joined:Feb 2011
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01-21-2013, 08:51 AM #3
オタマジャクシ Member
Posts:1,310 Threads:32 Joined:Nov 2012
The new priest arrived at a little church next to a nunnery on the edge of a city. After about two weeks the priest was summoned to go see the Bishop.

The Bishop and the cathedral were located in the center of town. Given his poverty the priest decided to walk. As he got close to the center of town the area took a distinctly seedy turn. At every corner he would pass attractively dressed women who would whisper, "Pssst, want a quicky?". As he would reach the next corner he would hear, "Pssst, want a quicky?"

After going a little further he arrived at the cathedral. After an inspiring session with the Bishop he headed home through the gauntlet and the cries of, "Pssst, want a quicky?"

Finally, he got back home. He decided to go visit the all knowing Mother Superior. They had good chat about his trip into town - and as he turned to go - a question occurred to him. "Mother Superior, what's a quicky?", he asked.

"Oh," she said, "about 20 bucks, the same as in town.".
01-21-2013, 10:49 AM #4
Octo Mother Superior
Posts:43,017 Threads:1,474 Joined:Feb 2011
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01-21-2013, 10:58 AM #5
JayRodney ⓐⓛⓘⓔⓝ
Posts:31,396 Threads:1,439 Joined:Feb 2011
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