#Login Register

  • 2 Vote(s) - 3 Average

03-18-2014, 12:40 PM #1
ocker1 Member
Posts:2,318 Threads:962 Joined:Mar 2011
Brikies letter to his boss

Dear sir, I am writing to inform you why I am not at work.
Yesterday, I went to check the storm damage .... at the top of the building. ..... I found that the hurricane had ... knocked down and broken .... some bricks from the chimney. .... So I rigged up a beam ... with a pulley ... to the top of the building, ... and hoisted up ... a couple of barrel ... loads of bricks.
When I had repaired .... the chimney, ... there were ... a lot of bricks ... left over, .. as well as .. the broken ones. ..... So I hoisted the barrel up again, ... and secured the rope ... at the bottom. .... I ascended once more .... to the top of the building .... and filled the barrel .. with the extra .. and the broken bricks. ..... Then returned to the ground, ... and untied the rope.
UNFORTUNATELY, ,,, the barrel was HEAVIER than I am, ... and before I realised .... what was happening, ... the barrel started down .... jerking me off my feet, ... jerking me off my feet.
I decided to hang ON to the rope, ..... and half way UP, ... I met the barrel ... coming DOWN, ... and received a severe blow to my shoulder .... and continued up, ... banging my head against the beam, ... and getting my fingers jammed in the pulley, ... breaking two of them.
When the barrel hit the ground, ...it burst it's bottom, .... allowing all the bricks ... to spill out. ..... I was now HEAVIER than the barrel, .... and so started ... DOWN ... at high speed, .. high speed. ..... Half way down, ... I met the barrel .... coming UP, .... breaking one leg ... and receiving severe injuries ... to the other shin. .... When I hit the ground, ... I landed.. on the bricks, ... getting several painful cuts ... and nasty bruises .... from the sharp edges.
At this point, ..this point, ... I must have .... temporarily, .... lost my presence of mind, .. because I .. let go the rope.
The barrel ... the barrel, ..... the BARREL, .. then came down ... giving me another heavy blow to the head, .... so I am now ... in .. hospital.
I respectfully ... request .. sick leave.
................ Yours ........,
03-18-2014, 12:44 PM #2
JayRodney ⓐⓛⓘⓔⓝ
Posts:30,202 Threads:1,487 Joined:Feb 2011
lol.gif Maybe writing with a head injury isn't the best idea.


03-18-2014, 12:46 PM #3
Octo Mother Superior
Posts:41,346 Threads:1,581 Joined:Feb 2011
lmao.gif That must have happened. rofl.gif
03-18-2014, 01:27 PM #4
NODOOM Truthtard
Posts:4,860 Threads:522 Joined:Sep 2012
That was a barrel of laughs. lmao.gif

Life is like a penny, you can spend it on what you like, but you can ONLY spend it once.


03-19-2014, 03:02 AM #5
ocker1 Member
Posts:2,318 Threads:962 Joined:Mar 2011
here's where it came from "The Dubliners "

03-19-2014, 04:53 AM #6
Ruby Wolf Member
Posts:10,078 Threads:719 Joined:Oct 2012
(03-18-2014, 01:27 PM)NODOOM Wrote:  That was a barrel of laughs. lmao.gif



DISCLAIMER / Terms of Service (TOS):
Kritterbox.com - Socialize anonymously, commentary, discussion, oddities, technology, music and more!  This website is provided "as is" without warranty of any kind, either expressed or implied. kritterbox.com shall not be liable for any damages whatsoever, including, without limitation, those resulting from loss of use, data or profits, whether or not advised of the possibility of damage, and on any theory of liability, arising out of or in connection with the use or performance of this site or other documents which are referenced by or linked to this site.
This website exists solely for the purposes of exchange of information, communication and general entertainment. Opinions from posters are in no way endorsed by kritterbox.com. All posts on this website are the opinion of the authors and are not to be taken as statements of fact on behalf of kritterbox.com. This site may contain coarse language or other material that kritterbox.com is in no way responsible for. Material deemed to be offensive or pornographic at the discretion of kritterbox.com shall be removed. kritterbox.com reserves the right to modify, or remove posts and user accounts on this website at our discretion. kritterbox.com disclaims all liability for damages incurred directly or indirectly as a result of any material on this website. Fictitious posts and any similarity to any person living or dead is coincidental.
All users shall limit the insertion of any and all copyrighted material to portions of the article that are relevant to the point being made, with no more than 50%, and preferably less of the original source material. A link shall be visible in text format, embedded directly to the original source material without exception.
No third party links, i.e. blogs or forums will be accepted under any circumstances, and will be edited by staff in order to reflect the original source of copyrighted material, or be removed at the sole discretion of kritterbox.com.
Fair Use Notice:
This site may contain copyrighted material the use of which has not always been specifically authorized by the copyright owner. Users may make such material available in an effort to advance awareness and understanding of issues relating to economics, individual rights, international affairs, liberty, science, and technology. This constitutes a 'fair use' of any such copyrighted material as provided for in section 107 of the US Copyright Law. In accordance with Title 17 U.S.C.Section 107, the material on this site is distributed without profit to those who have expressed a prior interest in receiving the included information for educational and/or research purposes.
This Disclaimer is subject to change at any time at our discretion.
Copyright © 2011 - 2017 kritterbox.com