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08-02-2014, 12:37 PM #1
ocker1 Member
Posts:2,275 Threads:937 Joined:Mar 2011
In a dark and hazy room, peering into a crystal ball, the Mystic delivered
grave news:

"There's no easy way to tell you this, so I'll just be blunt… Prepare
yourself to be a widow. Your husband will die a violent and horrible death
this year."

Visibly shaken, Laura stared at the woman's lined face, then at the single
flickering candle, then down at her hands.
She took a few deep breaths to compose herself and to stop her mind racing.
She simply had to know!
She met the Fortune Teller's gaze, steadied her voice and asked, "Will I be acquitted?"
08-02-2014, 01:02 PM #2
Octo Mother Superior
Posts:41,060 Threads:1,568 Joined:Feb 2011

08-02-2014, 01:41 PM #3
DaJavoo If looks could kilt
Posts:1,771 Threads:45 Joined:Mar 2011
08-02-2014, 02:48 PM #4
JayRodney ⓐⓛⓘⓔⓝ
Posts:30,191 Threads:1,487 Joined:Feb 2011


08-02-2014, 02:54 PM #5
Kreeper Griobhtha
Posts:11,008 Threads:758 Joined:Feb 2011

Little Johnny walked outside where his grandfather was having a beer.

Johnny:"Granddaddy, is that good?"

GF:"Well yes it is, Johnny"
Johnny: "Can I have some?"
GF: "Does your dick cover your asshole when you sit?"
Johnny: "No,"
GF: "Then no."

A bit later Johnny walked into the shed where his GF was smoking a pipe.

Johnny: "Granddaddy, is that good?"
GF:"Well yes it is, Johnny"
Johnny: "Can I have some?"
GF: "Does your dick cover your asshole when you sit?"
Johnny: "No,"
GF: "Then no."

A little bit later GF walked into the living room where Johnny was sitting with a plate of fresh baked cookies on his lap.

GF: "Do those taste as good as they look?"
Johnny: "Yes."
GF: "Can I have one?"
Johnny: "Does your dick cover your asshole when you sit?"
GF (smiling) :Why yes, yes it does."
Johnny: "Then go fuck yourself. Grandma made these for me."

What politics from both sides wants to teach us is that things are never complex. If you have your little package and something doesn't fit into that package, You don't know what to make of it so you want to dismiss it or then you will have to do the work of reconsidering your assumptions. - Michael Malice
08-02-2014, 04:29 PM #6
yankees skier
Posts:5,032 Threads:215 Joined:Feb 2011

08-02-2014, 07:14 PM #7
Ruby Wolf Member
Posts:10,078 Threads:719 Joined:Oct 2012
What do you tell a blonde with two black eyes?

Nothing you already told her twice (# - #)
08-02-2014, 07:28 PM #8
JayRodney ⓐⓛⓘⓔⓝ
Posts:30,191 Threads:1,487 Joined:Feb 2011
rofl.gif If blondes were their own ethnicity, wow would that be politically incorrect.




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