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hehehe
06-27-2018, 07:06 AM #1
ocker1 Member
Posts:2,264 Threads:930 Joined:Mar 2011
The teacher gave her fifth grade class an assignment: Get their parents to tell them a story with a moral at the end of it.

---The next day, the kids came back and, one by one, began to tell their stories.

There were all the regular types of stuff: Spilled milk and pennies saved. But then the teacher realized, that only Janie was left.

"Janie, do you have a story to share?"

"Yes ma'am. My daddy told me a story about my Mommy. She was a Marine pilot in Desert Storm, and her plane got hit. She had to bail out over enemy territory, and all she had was a flask of whiskey, a pistol, and a survival knife.

She drank the whiskey on the way down so the bottle wouldn't break, and then she parachuted right into the middle of 20 Iraqi troops........

She shot 15 of them with the pistol, until she ran out of bullets, killed four more with the knife, till the blade broke, and then she killed the last Iraqi with her bare hands."

''Good Heavens, 'said the horrified teacher. What did your Daddy tell you was the moral to this horrible story'?"

...."Don't Screw with Mommy when she's been drinking."
06-27-2018, 02:12 PM #2
Strigoi Member
Posts:1,725 Threads:89 Joined:Mar 2011
Similar has been said about me. 13.gif


37.gif
Random German Guy Show this Post
06-27-2018, 02:33 PM #3
Random German Guy Incognito Anonymous
 
(06-27-2018, 02:12 PM)Strigoi Wrote:  Similar has been said about me.  13.gif


37.gif

I believe I've read that you may enjoy moderating too much on occasion. lol.gif

ban.gif
06-27-2018, 05:01 PM #4
Octo Mother Superior
Posts:40,985 Threads:1,560 Joined:Feb 2011
Yeah I don't think moderation is her strongest suit batboy.jpg
06-27-2018, 06:01 PM #5
Kreeper Griobhtha
Posts:11,096 Threads:753 Joined:Feb 2011
chuckle.gif

I sure am glad my mom didn't drink. She was like that when sober.
06-27-2018, 06:57 PM #6
JayRodney ⓐⓛⓘⓔⓝ
Posts:30,213 Threads:1,484 Joined:Feb 2011
(06-27-2018, 06:01 PM)Kreeper Wrote:  chuckle.gif

I sure am glad my mom didn't drink. She was like that when sober.

We so had the same mom. gaah.gif
06-27-2018, 07:02 PM #7
Cynicalabsurdance Member
Posts:10,153 Threads:232 Joined:Feb 2011
well , with my Mom ,,,

Her Soap Operas came on ,,,

make sure you're miles away .

cause anything that interrupted Her during her " Soaps " time ,,,

she'd blame you ,,,

whackity whackity whack all over my Back

Fekk Soap Operas I say chuckle.gif
06-27-2018, 08:25 PM #8
Elegant Fail Member
Posts:334 Threads:14 Joined:Apr 2018
Everybody's mom is crazy to one degree or another, from a little odd about certain things to psycho.
RLK nli Show this Post
06-28-2018, 02:38 PM #9
RLK nli Incognito Anonymous
 
My mom is a lunatic, leaving home at 17 was a no brainer.
06-28-2018, 02:43 PM #10
Decaf Member
Posts:166 Threads:5 Joined:Apr 2018
So all of you have mother issues?

İmage
06-28-2018, 06:24 PM #11
UniqueStranger Art in my heart
Posts:14,889 Threads:444 Joined:Jun 2012
lol.gif It sure appears that way (mother issues). Recommended reading "Don't Blame Mother" by Paula Caplan.

06-28-2018, 06:33 PM #12
Octo Mother Superior
Posts:40,985 Threads:1,560 Joined:Feb 2011
I don't have mom issues really... Not saying my mother isn't crazy, but at least she was never a drinker.
06-28-2018, 10:48 PM #13
Meh Member
Posts:1,160 Threads:44 Joined:Apr 2017
chuckle.gif I've hears it said that we all become our mother. damned.gif That is the most frightening possibility I can imagine.
06-29-2018, 04:44 AM #14
Kreeper Griobhtha
Posts:11,096 Threads:753 Joined:Feb 2011
(06-27-2018, 06:57 PM)JayRodney Wrote:  
(06-27-2018, 06:01 PM)Kreeper Wrote:  chuckle.gif

I sure am glad my mom didn't drink. She was like that when sober.

We so had the same mom.  gaah.gif

My brother from an alien mother.

chuckle.gif
06-29-2018, 04:46 AM #15
Kreeper Griobhtha
Posts:11,096 Threads:753 Joined:Feb 2011
(06-28-2018, 02:43 PM)Decaf Wrote:  So all of you have mother issues?

İmage

Perhaps...

hmm.gif

She is medicated now and a MUCH better person.



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