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08-30-2013, 09:00 AM #1
ocker1 Member
Posts:2,252 Threads:916 Joined:Mar 2011
You can't get more romantic than this!

Aussie stockman and his wife had just got married and found a quiet hotel for their wedding night.

The man approached the front desk and asked for a room.

He said, 'We're on our honeymoon and we need a nice room, with a good strong bed."

The clerk winked,

'You want the 'Bridal'?'

The drover reflected on this for a moment and then replied,

"Nah, I reckon not. I'll just hold onto her ears until she gets used to it."
08-30-2013, 10:58 AM #2
Accidental Stoner Member
Posts:8,633 Threads:78 Joined:Feb 2011
08-30-2013, 11:41 AM #3
JayRodney ⓐⓛⓘⓔⓝ
Posts:30,345 Threads:1,478 Joined:Feb 2011

These three guys are in a bar, having a few beers, and checking
out the babes as they enter the establishment.

One walks in, rather attractive, and they "discuss" her "rating,"
which, of course, is on a 1 to 10 scale.

One says, "I'd give her a 7... she's really quite pretty."
Another agrees, and so does the third, but the bartender,
bringing A new round of drinks to their table, overhears their
rating of the young lass, checks her out himself, and says "Nah,
I'd only give her a 3."

"A THREE?! How can you give her a three?!!!" says one of the
three chaps at the table, "she's a real pretty girl." The
bartender, walking away, says "Well, I use the Budweiser method
for rating women."

Puzzled, the guys looked at each other, figured the bartender had
lousy taste in women, and went back to their ratings.

Moments later, another young lady, prettier than the last, walks
into the bar, and they confer between themselves and decide she
deserves a 9. However, the bartender, wiping off the table
nearest to theirs, again overhears their rating of the gal,
checks her out himself, and tells the fellows that he'd only give
her a 5. "A FIVE?! How can you give her just a FIVE?!!! She's
absolutely gorgeous!!!"

The bartender casually replies that, again, he uses "the
Budweiser method for rating women."

"The Budweiser method?!" they puzzled, as the bartender returned
to his post behind the bar. They were quite confused.

Three, maybe four minutes passed by, and then a marvelously
STUNNING blonde, 5'11" goddess walks into the bar. Long luscious
legs, sexy shape... truly a work of flawless perfection!!!
Without hesitation, the three "judges" at the table determine
that this young sultress is, without any doubt, a 10. However,
carrying a case of beer past them to restock the supply behind
the bar, the bartender -- once more overhearing their rating of
the girl -- glances studiously at her, and reveals to the chaps
that the best, the very BEST that he could give her, would be a
7. "A SEVEN?!!! How in the WORLD could you give her just a mere
SEVEN?!!! She's GORGEOUS!!!"

"Well," says the bartender, again, "I use the Budweiser method
for rating women."

"BUDWEISER?!!!" Says one of the guys, exasperated, "What in the
Hell is this 'Budweiser method' for rating women?!!!"

"Well, says the bartender, "the Budweiser method for rating women
is the number of Clydesdales it would take to pull her off my face."


08-30-2013, 12:54 PM #4
Octo Mother Superior
Posts:41,113 Threads:1,549 Joined:Feb 2011



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