(06-29-2013, 05:05 AM)Cynicalabsurdance Wrote: I had an awesome day
did not gripe
friend came by gave me a Cruiser Bike
went and rested
then went into the forest and played with beepers
came out of the forest
did not see a fight nor accident
saw a lot of women in summer cloths looking HOT
saw a lot of FAT people in summer cloths
looking NOT hot
had chips Ahoy cookies just now
i had Spicy Boneless Chicken wings for lunch ( a pound and a half
of them ,,,, YUM STUFFED HIPPIE ME ! )
Beepers got her Pig Skin snack to chew
Sun was out and bright
beach was awesome
Found a Deer Antler in the Forest
watched three doggies smile at Beepers and her smile back
Pulled a Tick from my Beard
and rested again
then ,,,, I rested some more
I only ache a little and only in a few places
I only dropped a couple things on the ground today
and neither did I step on and break
i also found both of them this time
without beepers help
I only had the squirts once , and this time i made it
to a toilet first
I did not throw my back out today by sneezing and coughing at
the same time
nor did I throw it out by Sneezing and farting at the same time
My eye's only itched for a couple hours today instead of all day
I did not take a nap today and still i did not get a grumpy
Mirabel was very nice to me today and talked
while she batted her eyelashes
and i only got one spot where i caught poison Oak today
I had an awesome day today
life is good, huh CA
life was swell today
not one wet fart , and only three times did i get triple vision
and head spins
not once did i sneeze and loosen my front tooth
I did stumble over a Boulder
but it said excuse me so I let it pass
Crows shït on my windshield
but i can't see to drive today anyway
so that was not a problem
I sat in the forest and Mimic dog barks while i hid in the creek
it got a bunch of dogs running around barking back at me
and the owners running around calling them
so that was Epic
I had a Bee buzz me ,, but my socks stink so bad it
fell into a Coma
OH OH ,,, OH YEAH ,,, I almost forgot ,,,
I made an Elderly Lady say " F_CK YOU "
I was walking by her house while she was attempting to get out
of her Buick
She had to rock back and forth to turn her knees out
of the car , ( Cause she weighed more than the Buick )
She is on the curb side as I walked by
I stopped and watched her with a Curled lip
like she was Butt Barf
I even said " EEEEEEEWWWWwwwwwwwweeee !
She looked at me ,,
I said : " Mame ,,, You have excessive ASS ! "
have another ton of Bon Bon's ,,, will ya ? "
she was rocking trying to get momentum to bounce
off the set and stand
and that stopped her in mid rocking
heh heh I timed it just right
That's when the 75 year old Barrel of Bulbous Cellulite
yelled : " F_UCK YOU A$$HOLE "
Rich Fat people get pissy when you say something truthful
to them ,,,
today was Epic for me and the Beepers Queen
know what's really funny ?
most of that up there is true
any day we can just set and Veg out ,,, that's a good one alright
The day ended with this guy Richard stopping by to
tell me ::::
" Man Dude ,,, I just lost a $500 Camera ,,,
it belonged to my Boss ,,,
after work Dude , I sat it on the roof of the Car and drove off
( He has a 1979 Trans Am and Peels rubber everytime he touches the
gas pedal )
I guess it flew off the car ( Well , that kinda makes sense )
I went back after a few hours when my Boss asked where it was
and I couldn't find it in my Car ,,,,
it wasn't there at the Jobsite either ,,,
My Boss is BUMMED !
This is the same guy who tried to close the hood on my Van
with the Prop Rod still up ,,,
and he bent the Rod ,, he got the hood closed ,,,
I gotta film this guy in action , swear to GAWD
I rested a lot, now I am bored and forced to be inside lol.
that's why I won't let them mess with my skin cancer
I ignore it
it ignores me
we're both happy that way
"when life gives you lemons..throw them at someone"...Grumpy Cat
are you sure ?
you're not missing time are you ?
Those Aliens always leave you thinking it was just a nap .
"when life gives you lemons..throw them at someone"...Grumpy Cat
or five ours you'll now miss ?
Just in case you missed it ,,, I actually did laundry today
I haven't done laundry in years
I always throw the cloths away and buy Thrift store new ones ,,,
so now I'm missing two hours out of my FUN life .
While I was at the Laundromat ,,,,,
Some OLD Broad tried to hit on me ,,
she was almost as OLD as me ,,, maybe 15 years younger then me
like about early 40's vintage
good luck with that ,, I thought .
She was talking about Cabo San Lucas down in
Baja Calif .
and I tuned to look at the clock on the wall and ,,,
" shït !!!!! I forgot my Prom Dress at the Cleaners !!!! "
She actually said : " Oh , they don't close til 5:00pm "
so i walked Beepers some more until my cloths were dried .
Damned Old Hoochies
when i came back
she approached me again ,,,
she began to speak and I interrupted with :
" Don't you have a Grand Daughter I can date ? "
and walked out as she gasped
Damned OLD Hoochies
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